This is the very first photo milord ever took of me:
Why I wanted to show this should be obvious by the time you finish reading below.
After I posted my blog about my first visit with him, milord instructed me to thereinafter more strictly follow the blogging format employed by his other subs, using links and photos as they describe their adventures with him and their feelings about them. When I was with milord this past weekend, he explained exactly what he meant. This is one of the Procedures he has now taught me. Milord has few Rules; he expects his subs, however, to learn many Procedures.
Given the context in which he first raised this blogging procedure, that is, following the format of his other subs, I suppose the first emotion I should explore is how I feel about the fact that milord has other subs. It may surprise many to read that it does not bother me. I entered this relationship with open eyes. Milord lists his "Dating Status" here as "Polyamorous," and displays his other subs on his profile and in his gallery. I have not met them yet, but milord has informed me that he intends I should meet them soon.
In that regard, on my profile I list my orientation as "Bi-curious." This curiosity has increased greatly since I joined this site. Milord has come right out and said he expects that I will have the opportunity to satisfy this curiosity when I meet one or both of his other subs. I know it sounds awful, but it actually turns me on that he is planning my sexual experiences for me, even those with other people.
One of milord's other subs is an accomplished photographer. She has already said she wants to photograph me. I am really looking forward to that!
Milord takes nice photographs, too. Here is one he took when we first got together last month:
Here is one he took last weekend:
Here is a similar picture with pearls:
Those pearls! The night before, milord had done the most amazing things with those pearls. The best was when he covered the whole strand with a stimulating oil, inserted almost the whole thing in me, then slowly withdrew it while using his tongue on me at the same time. In my mind, this photo commemorates that:
I still get shivers remembering!
Looking through milord's Gallery prompted me to ask him why he takes so many pictures of his subs performing fellatio on him. For example, here is one of the first photos milord ever took of me:
And here is one from this past weekend.
He gave two reasons. First, he noted these were some of the only times during lovemaking that his hands were not busy doing something more important. He is certainly right about that!
He then went on to explain that the main reason he likes to display such pictures is that fellation is the ultimate in, as he put it, "obsequious intimacy." I asked if this meant he thought it was degrading, and that's why he displays them. He said that it is just the opposite, and that he finds not just pleasure, but "comfort," in oral sex.
I'm not sure I understand that entirely yet, but I'm starting to get a better grasp on it. Thinking back over the weekend, I think my initial mistake was by not realizing the emphasis he places on intimacy in everything. Milord is always a gentleman, and I think there is intimacy in all of the things he does with me, whether they be intensely sexual (and, to be fair, I should mention he gives me more cunnilingus than I give him fellatio), or as simple as stroking my shoulder as we pass in a hallway.
Which brings us back to that simple photo with which I started this blog. Milord took it the first day we met, and posted it here a few days later. He added an effect, however, darkening the edges so that, despite the flowers around me, the only focus is on my face. It makes the picture, I believe, much more intimate.
Of Love & Dumplings
DATE: Aug 02 2012, 2:49 pm / MOOD: Hungry
I have figured out why I have fallen so hard for milord.
A few weeks ago, I happened to mention "Pierogi Fest" to him, telling him that being of pure Polish descent, I had practically grown up on pierogis. I never suggested that we go; I had mentioned it almost in jest.
Then, last Saturday morning he called me from his car, said he was a half hour from my place, and that I should dress comfortably for a day at the Fest. This was a complete surprise. I did not even think I'd be seeing milord last weekend.
We had a wonderful day together at the Fest. We rode the carousel, danced before, during, and after the Polka Parade (which included such attractions as the Accordion Strikeforce, the Pierogettes, the Babushka Brigade, a precision lawn mower drill team, Carmelite nuns on skates, and the world famous Pierogi Pups), and ate every kind of pierogi you might imagine (the alligator was surprisingly good). He went so far as to include pictures of me at the Fest (plus one from later) in his gallery here!
The point is, he devoted a day of his life to something that interested me, and seemed sincerely happy to do it.
I wasn't sure what I expected when I first agreed to visit milord. I guess I expected everything to be centered on BDSM and sex. There has been plenty of that, but that has been the natural consequence of time spent centered on us as people and the relationship that has grown between us.
I first met milord to learn about dominance and submission, but each time I see him, I learn more about love.
Trial Run
DATE: Aug 20 2012, 6:09 pm / MOOD: In love
I spent the past 16 days living in milord's house. The purpose of this was for milord and me, together with the other two members of his extended "family," to determine if we have the potential for long-term compatibility. At the end of that time we all agreed it had gone very well.
Milady spent every of the three weekends during that period with us as well. She is the first woman with whom I have ever made love. I had always been interested in, even intrigued by, what a lesbian affair might be like. Now I know. It is wonderful, even magical.
Milady is a photographer, and honored me by asking me to model for her. She has posted here some of the photos she took of me. This is my favorite of them.
Milady also taught me many things that will allow me to make milord happier, from how he likes his food (heavy on the herbs and spices) to how he likes us to wear makeup for play (heavy on the eyes), plus a lot of intimate secrets improper to share here. Speaking of fun and games, milord already has blogged about a competition between milady and me that turned out best for everybody.
Finally, this last weekend, milord's other pet Casey, who is milady's younger sister, was able to join the rest of us. Four in bed is far better than three! It ensures that no one is left out of the action unless she wants to be. Most importantly, though, all of us spent three days together under the same roof, and everyone seemed happy with it.
I entitle this blog "Trial Run" for obvious reasons. That does not indicate, however, any imminent change in anyone's living arrangements. I am already enrolled in Chicago for the coming semester. So it will be months, if not longer, before these past couple weeks of emotional and physical bliss might turn into something more permanent.
Before and After
DATE: Aug 31 2012, 11:09 am / MOOD: Thankful
Following the specific directive and general form of the latest blog from milord, I present some "before and after" images.
This is me before I met milord:
This is me since I met milord, milady, and her sister:
Note that the only two lines to change were "Orientation" and "Dating Status." This is all equally well explained by another pair of "before and after" images.
This is me before I met milord:
This is me since I met milord, milady, and her sister:
Whether you prefer words or pictures, I think that pretty well sums things up.
Missing Him, Missing Them, Missing Us
DATE: Jan 21 2013, 10:15 am / MOOD: Horny
With the holidays and all the other demands on everyone's time, it has been over a month since I have seen milord, and longer still since we've spent time with milady and Casey. I took a long walk in the cold this morning to try to work how badly I want to be with them out of my system. All I got out of that was a really nice self-portrait.
My apparent contentment in solitude is a fiction. Looking at this just makes me wish they were in the photo with me. I've come to realize I feel incomplete when not with them. I wish I could be with them every day.
I hope someday I can!
Do Train Rides Make Me Horny?
DATE: May 17 2013, 6:17 am / MOOD: Excited
There is a cliche that the rhythmic movements of trains turn women on. Well, I'm taking the Amtrak up to Milwaukee today to see milord, milady, and the lovely Casey. I'm already horny in anticipation. If the cliche is true, I wonder what I'll be like by the time I arrive!
24/7
DATE: May 27 2013, 8:04 pm / MOOD: Ecstatic
Milord has requested that I move in with him for the summer as his 24/7 property.
It's no secret that I'm inclined to accept, but I thought I should think it over first. He graciously gave me until next Sunday to decide.
I'm almost certain to say "yes."
Before I do, does anyone have any comments or suggestions?
Grokking in Fullness
DATE: Jun 18 2013, 8:06 am / MOOD: Contemplative
At milord's suggestion, I just read Robert Heinlein's Stranger in a Strange Land.
Among other conclusions I've drawn from this book, it occurs to me that milord's household is set up like Michael's nest near the end of the book.
It also compels the realization that mutual polyamorousness is the most moral form of sexuality.
I am going to reflect on all this more, then maybe read the book again.
I can't believe it's already been two year since we got together.
Here is how it happened.
Worth 1000 Words!
DATE: May 08 2012, 4:11 am / MOOD: Impressed
I never realized posting a few old photos could have such a response!
It's kind of a turn on.
I must post MORE!
Fuck me?
DATE: May 13 2012, 11:22 am / MOOD: Confused
During an exchange of comments regarding one of my photos, a man [NOTE: this was not milord Augustus] wrote that he would "very much like to fuck" me. I had gone so far as to type the reply that "a lady does not want to be 'fucked,' she wants to be made love to"; then canceled the reply when I realized that to reply this way would have been hypocritical. I realized I was incredibly turned on, and that it was caused by his declaration of his desire to "fuck" me.
Up until now, I'd assumed that if a man who I had just met in real life declared that he would "very much like to fuck" me, I'd have slapped his face and poured a cold drink in his crotch. Now I don't know how I would react. This site is certainly opening my eyes to things, but I'm not sure always in a good way.
Do Not Try this at Home?
DATE: Jun 18 2012, 12:16 pm / MOOD: Curious
Wow. What a shock and a rush to come online here, click over to the "HOME" page, and find pictures of myself with an erect penis in my mouth! Let me tell you how this came to be. I hope no one will think me too foolish!
Because I had some inkling that I'm a natural submissive, I joined MyDungeonSpace on May 7 of this year to see what I might learn about the Lifestyle. I liked right away how I was approached and complimented by all kinds of men, but that rush quickly wore off. Most were just talkers, and never found the backbone necessary to take things beyond that. I may be new to this, but I knew that I didn't want a Dom who was not even confident enough to make the first move. At the other end of the spectrum, two guys were so overbearing that I simply couldn't stand it. One went so far as to declare he knew he'd be a good Master to me, and actually got insulting when I balked at immediately leaving school and relocating to Dallas to be come his slave.
Then I noticed a tiny little blog from a man saying he had redecorated his profile page. Out of curiosity, I looked, and was immediately intrigued by the personality it suggested. Elegant in its simplicity, and at first seemingly graced only with classic art, scrolling down it became shamelessly, and yet somehow still tastefully, pornographic. I immediately requested his friendship and was thrilled when he accepted.
I won't bore you with the details of our next several weeks correspondence. I will simply note that he always wrote and, once we went to video chat, spoke to me as a gentleman. He never imposed nude pictures of himself on me, nor requested nude pictures of me, even though I knew from his profile page and talking with him that he enjoyed such things. I began to worry he was just another talker, only more interesting and eloquent than the others.
Then last week he invited me to meet him at a big Six Flags theme park about half way between our respective hometowns. Finally, someone who made the first move, but was smart and sensitive enough to suggest we first meet in a public place. I immediately said I would meet him there.
We spent most of Friday at Six Flags, riding the rides, seeing the shows, and just enjoying each other's company. When suppertime came, he mentioned he "had taken the liberty" of making dinner reservations at a nearby sushi bar. Again, he suggested that I follow him in my car, so I would know I was safe.
Quite honestly, I already would have willingly gotten in his car with him. The restaurant was in the direction of my home, however, so not knowing how the night would end, it made sense for me to bring my car. That I might not be getting home that night first really sunk in when he turned off Highway 45 and I saw from the sign that the restaurant was in a fancy hotel. It was also then that I realized how incredibly horny the idea of walking into that hotel with him had made me.
Dinner was a wonderful blur of sashimi, sake, and sexual innuendo. Fairly early on he confirmed that he had indeed reserved a room in that hotel and hoped that I would stay the night with him. I did not even pretend to be coy. From that point on, I just wanted to get upstairs, but he purposely dragged out dinner, clearly to make me suffer in my need. More than a room, he'd gotten us a suite. I will not burden you with all the sweaty details, but as soon as we got inside it began a weekend of the best sex I have ever had. (The recently posted pictures of me giving him oral sex, which I mention at the start of this blog, was the very start of it all.)
Which brings us to the part that might get people mad at me. Saturday morning, he asked me if I wanted to spend the rest of the weekend with him. I made it clear there was nothing I wanted more. He then invited me to come with him up to his house near Milwaukee. He gave me the option of us spending another day in the suite, or even going to my apartment in Oak Park. He explained that his home was the most spacious, and thus most comfortable, of the three, and so if I was comfortable with the idea, it made the most sense to go there.
I did not hesitate. I agreed to let him take me to his home in another state. We left my car at in the hotel parking lot.
Was that stupid, or was I right to trust my instincts? Obviously, it tuned out fine, because I'm back at home, alone (and lonely) typing this. He drove me back down to the hotel late last night to get my car, and I drove back here from there.
Was I, and am I, being too reckless in trusting him so soon? He said he plans to have me visit him again soon. I'll go. I can't wait.
Proudly On Display
DATE: Jun 21 2012, 2:32 pm / MOOD: Indifferent
If you happened to read my last blog, then you know that I spent this past weekend with a man I met through this site. We did many fun and interesting things together, both sexual and nonsexual. Our play included him taking photographs of me.
I knew he'd be posting them here (just as he has posted photos of other lovers), and I didn't object. He has also had those other lovers do blogs about how they felt about being put on display, and has now instructed me to do the same. Should I be embarrassed by all this?
e posted two kinds of pictures of me. There were posed nudes. There was also a series of me giving him oral sex. The nudes are rather artistic. The others completely profane. I love the contrast.
I'm fully comfortable with my body. I really don't care if people see me nude. In fact, as I noted in my first blog, it was kind of a turn-on to have so many men responding so lustily to the first few old snapshots I posted here. Reading the comments that have been posted about me nude is an absolute thrill!!!
I will admit, on the other hand, that seeing photos of myself with a penis in my mouth was a bit of a shock the first time, but now they simply are what they are. After all, what's the big deal? Of course if I've spent a weekend with a man I'll probably have given oral sex. I did it because it's fun and because it pleased a man whom I already care for and with whom I spent an exciting and wonderful weekend. If people want to see what it looked like, I'm happy to let them see.
So, oddly enough, after reflecting upon it, the only emotion I find myself feeling about these photos is pride.
Very Excited
DATE: Jul 05 2012, 3:49 pm / MOOD: Full of life
I just confirmed that I'm going to get to spend the weekend again with the Dom I visited last month. I like where this all seems to be heading!
