"I told my girlfriend that the tradition was for students to bring their teachers apples, but she still insisted on bringing her professor a pineapple every day. It's odd, but it must be working. She started scheduling time with him each day after she got that first "F" and her grade has quickly improved to an "A.""
"I'm a cum hungry sissy queer and I'm so happy the dirty old men in the park know it, because they are more than happy for me to drain their balls, yay."