"I was walking home after drinking a little too much at the pub. As I went through the park I sat down, and I think that's when I met her. The next morning I'm all locked up. I now go to that park bench every night in the hopes of seeing her again, but I'm not sure what she looked like. Do I just ask every woman that walks past for the key?"
"... As a self-locker, I sometimes play my own little chastity games. Like today. I put it on to run some errands, and left the key in my nightstand. ... My roommate just sent me this pic with the message "Hey Roomie! I noticed one of these was missing from your room today. And when you get home, you'll notice the other is missing too!!!... See you tonight! ;)" ...and, um, I can use some help here. What the fuck do I do now!?"