"You treat your fleshlight like your sister now treats your loads—storing them inside until something breaks. Same routine, different hole—pump, grunt, fill, repeat. No cleanup, no aftercare, just daily deposits. Turns out sisters have the same warranty problem as sex toys—once you pump them full of cum for a few months, they start showing signs of malfunction. That pregnancy test wasn't in the user manual! But hey, at least your new fleshlight comes with its own maintenance issues—morning sickness and swollen belly. Should've read the fine print before dumping your baby batter in the family gene pool!"