"Keto diet, protein diet, all those trendy diets; nothing matched good, natural Mother's Milk. Always fresh and happily delivered for hungry, growing boys."
"No matter how old you get, you never get tired of the "Mommy's Gonna Getcha!" game. Of course, it's more fun now than when you were littler."
""Do I look alright for your birthday party, son?" "Jesus mom, all my friends'll be there! Why do you have to dress like a nun? Show some skin!""