"We were having a great time at the festival and then my wife suddenly disappeared for 30 minutes. I guess she went to get some face paint because she had blue smeared all over her lips and around her mouth when she got back. That white paint they used wasn't very good quality. It was more opaque than white and looked like someone sprayed it randomly all over her face and tits."
"Hey Honey! Look at this stud I picked up at the club. I know you were looking forward to a long evening shopping for new panties and girly clothes, but you can come home early. He said he doesn't mind at all if you lick him clean after he's done with me and suck him hard for the next round. I blew him at the club and his cum tastes great so you're in for a treat!"
"Would you stop telling everyone we meet how chilly the water is. We both know it never gets any bigger than that. Now, let's go see if we can find two or three guys with massive cocks to invite back to our room before our dinner reservation."