So I guess I should explain some of my motivation behind my CD behaviour. Well I'll try to as I don't fully understand it myself. Its not really a sexual thing for me. Sure sometimes I get hard and decide to play with myself when dressed but I think deep down theres a part of me that wishes I was a woman.

The fact is if I had the ability to switch genders I probably would. There's so many things I wonder about. Are female orgasms so much better than mens? What's it like to have breasts and experience sex as a woman?

Sadly there's no way to find this out. Sure there's the whole long process of changing gender through surgery and hormones but at the end of the day, while physically you would appear female (And most aren't convincing enough I'm afraid) you're still genetically a male. I'd want to be fully female, right down to the brain chemistry and reproductive system.

In the short time I've been here the albums I've added as favourites are both for Bailey Jay, one of the few truly convicing Shemales out there (Well, until she takes her panties off that is). That's why she's the ultimate "Trap", so to speak. She is genuinely feminine looking and could have been born like that. Sadly there's no way I'll ever be as hot looking as her. Mostly through a lack of time and money to go through with it, but also due to the fear and my age (30 is probably not going to result in someone who looks like a stunning 20 year old girl).

I've rambled on though. At the end of the day it's just a fantasy. I'm never going to be like that and I'm ok with it. I'll just try on some girly clothing from time to time and make myself feel feminine for a few hours a week.