This is a subject that has long interested me; like all the others here with dirty tastes it is one we're all confronted with. Those of us with strong sexual drive combined with unusual tastes cannot do much to ignore that. Just pretending they will go away isn't an option. The large majority of people I've chatted to on-line about whether their partners 'know' say that they do it entirely in secret - even the fact of going on-line, looking at porn, chatting and masturbating is hidden from their partner.

So one solution is to be with someone on a permanent basis - perhaps happily, perhaps less so - but to have a secret life.Another solution is to live the sex side to the full but never to have a serious partner. This means you can fuck who you want, masturbate and watch as much porn as you want, hang out in louch saunas, wear rubber and shit your own pants, and whatever else, and not have to worry that the wife or the new boyfriend will find you out - because you avoid any commitments that would be a constraint.But if you do want more than just sex in your life, how to have the companionship, even love, while recognising your own particular sexual needs?

One way is to make the sex the first criterion of meeting up with someone and a good part of the criterion of staying with them - which means that internet meeting or some other form of ads is probably the most likely route - and then see whether there is anymore to it. If yes, stick together, if no, go your own way.The other approach I guess is to go out with colleagues or friends of friends or someone you meet at the dance or the art class and then hope, if they are nice and the sex gets steamy and they start to find out about you, that they will accept you as you are. This is the less cynical, less calculating approach but one, it seems to me, replete with risks of failure and ridicule.

And then there are the couples - very rare I suspect - who just become filthy together and never look back. Romantic dirtiness - how many in that rare breed?