I've been asked if I'm happier since I cut it off.  Honestly, I can't say I'm exactly happier being dickless, but I am so relieved that the compulsion to chop it off is over.  I had thoughts/dreams/fantasties about cutting it off since I was very young.  Don't ask why; I really have no idea.  The urges came and went over the years, and penectomy play was a fairly regular part of my masturbation routine.  Never had the nerve to ask a woman to play for fear of being labeled a freak and that the word would get out.  I took my chances when my ex left.  The last night we saw each other, I asked her to cut off my penis.  She didn't seem shocked by my request, she simply declined.  So, after a few brief rebound relationships, I found myself alone for qutie a while.  It finally seemed like the right time to cut it off.  Fortunately, I had a friend from school who had become a surgical nurse.  I told her I was going to cut off my penis.  At first she thought I was joking.  When she realized I wasn't, she urged me to get counseling, or at least get it surgically removed.  I told her I was going to cut it off with or without her help, so she very reluctantly agreed.  Funny thing is, back in high school, like many guys, I kind of had a crush on her.  Yet, the first and only time she ever saw and touched my penis was to cut it off.  Can't say that was such a bad sendoff, really.

Anyway, back to my original point, I sometimes dream I still have it, and I awake reaching for something that isn't there. I used to wake up with throbbing erections, and I could never quite decide if I needed to get laid or if I should just cut it off.  Jerking off only temporarily made the thoughts subside.  Now, although I still get horny (my balls are still intact and healthy), I look at and touch my stump and am oddly satisfied that I have been relieved of that organ that craved so much attention.  Most importantly, I am free of the urge to chop it off, as it is over and done with.