This started from a sexy wank and chat discussion in between me and LeivReschiw  -- I'm summarizing the rules we came up for gooning below. Would love to hear more suggestions here and comments please!

• masturbate is your life: jerk off every day
• start every day with masturbation right in your bed
• last thing you do before you sleep is masturbate
• each session must last at least 1 hour, if you cum before that ruin it!
• every bit of precum and cum spilling from you must be eaten by you: eat your (pre)cum
• every time you see a girl, remember to jerk off
• you don't have to wait until you're horny to start masturbating: wank your cock when it's soft too even if you don't feel horny
• go deeper
• stay away from women: your hand is all you will ever need; stay pussy free and sexless
• buy lots and lots and lots of sex toys
• buy porn, lots of porn, more porn, constantly expand your porn altar
• obey, your penis rules you and porn rules your penis
• isolate yourself from all others, except gooners and porn
• live in a small cheap apartment so you have more money to spend on porn
• make a porn room in your apartment, where you have all your porn and toys and lots of screen to watch porn
• only enter the porn room naked
• your porn room should never be cleaned or aired and should smell of cock and cum ad balls and masturbation all the time
• don't wash your cock! your masturbationn room should always smell of cock and balls and sperm
• don't cum in a towel: let your cum spray allover the room on the bed on the carpet on the walls
• play with your asshole all the time while you goon
• always goon with your mouth open so you drool allover yourself
• sniff worn underwear, bras, socks and shoes as often as you can while you goon
• always watch porn with volume turned loud
• be loud and moan and groan while you goon all the time, never hold back, be vocal!