I had penectomy fantasies since I was very young. I don't know why, I was just always fascinated at the thought of cutting it off. My earliest erections came from those thoughts. As I got older, I enjoyed my penis as much as any other young guy would. I jerked off a lot, and when I got to dating age, I loved everything about sex. Still, the penectomy thoughts lingered, and I'd still fantasy play with knives and scissors, just as I had done since I was a young boy. I kept my fantasies to myself, right up until a few years ago. My ex and I were splitting up. On the last night we saw each other, I asked her for one final favor. When she asked what it was, I said, "Cut off my penis."  Surprisingly, she didn't seem shocked; she just shook her head and said, "I can't."

Fast forward a few years. I looked up an old friend who I knew could help. Off course she tried to discourage me. Get counseling, or at least find a way to get it removed surgically. I told her I was going to cut it off myself with or without help. All I was asking was for help getting patched up. 

When I tied it off and chopped it off, the sheer rush and shock was stronger than the pain - very briefly. But the sight of my own detached penis lying there was the most exhilarating thing I've ever experienced.