For reference, I still feel bad for the one guy from the chat, I did tell him to message me here but he never did.... I still check the chat in general on occasion though. I've come to the understanding that the IF chat is a better idea than PornHub having a Discord. However, what I will give PornHub's server is the fact that in joining it I at least now have another stream of continual entertainment again-- most servers I join die fairly quickly. Also apparently calling someone young is an insult in these parts.

In general I have been working on purifying my floor of the house. Stuff has been calming down a bit, and I have found myself with relative control of my time for the moment, thanks in no small part to these apps and sites. Feeling like I'm worth others' time seems to be of help. However, the texturing I am referring to is a little more direct. Whether it's weed and booze, incense or alignments of stones, the background music of course, the idea is I seem to be directing my energies in more immediate ways.

I'm not too sure what the future holds for me. Perhaps that is true of many right now. Eventually I may open up more outlets of my music and fashion and such, but for now I'm taking it day by day. Sleep is still a weird one for me-- specifically getting to sleep, as even the amount I sleep seems to be in a relatively steady state at the moment. I've considered noting active times of the day and lining it up with background music as a preliminary measure at least.

I suppose, however, there's more to it than just that. Walking all the way miles out of town only to find a random makeshift raft along the river and paddle down it with a stick a little while could also count as a texture I suppose. There is more than just texture for reference- mood, aesthetic, even stuff like tint or shade work. My fiance enjoys the latest slime and ASMR trends and I don't blame her.

It's weird that this week there hasn't been much doing. Haven't even worn my blazer all that much. Last night I was listening to music more so for my mind to have its own entertainment while I was still up, before I blurred more over into sleep. In fact even when I have been doing more, it's mostly activities related to catching up on what had been previously left behind. This week has been all about the ways I -haven't- been working. I'm a little bit concerned though, doesn't this lend to a less bohemian nature? If I remain so concerned with all this stuff, I remain ignorant of minimalist considerations and effective practices. I am for the efficiency of it-- I can easily achieve the same means, or rather, maintain the same means of living such a lifestyle with that much less.

It ends up with me caught in between a continuous disregard for the present moment in the pursuit of nonattachment in itself, and a dubious understanding of my overall situation. I would like to consider that bohemian can be a little bit different than ascetic, in that it can umbrella the ascetic lifestyle but does not always have to. The question is what I do.

All the stuff is here. Moreover even if much of the tangible items go, my digital world is to only grow more convoluted. If we could just take the capitalism out of technology. After all, capitalism, much like bureaucracy overall, is a technology itself so to speak. However, I grow tired of these infinitesimal rabbit holes found in the annals of Reddit threads and Discord servers. They are living proof of the power of the web as a time vampire-- not that I don't already know this, just that I am affirming where even I slip and fall down those holes.

If I really have enough of a say in my time, I would have an idea or two of what to get on immediately, yes. The classic notion is big stuff first, and in this case that doesn't just mean task wise. It's actual physical stuff in this case. More specifically, for reference at the moment I'm thinking maybe a drink and the larger boxes of stuff, maybe with a little bit of review at the beginning of course. I'll have to take the drink after checking my phone though, and maybe a toke somewhere in there. Plenty of texture to go around after all. There will be time to dance-- the radio will still be playing....

-Russly