My love for bondage as part of my D/s scenes is described in my previous posts.  So it should be no surprise that I am also a big fan of selfbondage.  I encourage my sub partners to learn and practice selfbondage because it gives us additional opportunities for control, instructions/tasks, and mutual pleasure.

When I cannot be with my sub, I often leave instructions for her to gag and tie herself at a specified time and for a certain length of time.  When that time arrives, I am aroused with the knowledge that, even in my absence, my wonderful sub is following my wishes.  The instructions always include a crotch rope and breast bondage.  Sometimes I am specific about the bondage position.  Other times I leave the choice to my sub and require her to email me afterwards with a detailed description of the position and her experience.  I give directions about use of toys or not and whether she may cum or not.  Selfbondage is also fun when my sub and I are apart and engage in phone sex or cam play.

Selfbondage is an excellent way to begin a D/s scene.  I often tell my sub partner when I will arrive and instruct her to be in selfbondage for a specified period of time beforehand, usually thirty minutes.  I always leave the choice of position up to my sub as long as her mouth, pussy, and ass are readily accessible.  I require her to find ways to pleasure herself while in the selfbondage but deny her permission to orgasm until I am present to give it.

The sight of my precious sub aroused and in bondage as I enter always gets me hard instantly.  Imagine the questions in her mind at that moment.  "Will Sir let me cum or will He tease me further?"  "Which will Sir use first: mouth, pussy, or ass?"  "Will Sir touch me right away or will He sit, relax, and stroke His cock while watching me squirm?"  When I sometimes require my sub to add a blindfold, there is an added element of uncertainty/fear until I speak.

For those who have never tried selfbondage, a common concern is how to release him/herself.  There are many sites and sources of information on that topic.  I forget where I discovered the method I teach to my sub partners and will describe now.

1. Get a short piece of rope, 3-4 feet long.  A bathrobe sash works well.

2. Make a loop about 6 inches in diameter.

3. Complete the loop with a knot that will NOT slip.  A square or granny knot is best.  This is critical because any type of slipknot will tighten beyond control.

4. Put both hands through the loop so that the loop is around the wrists.

5. Twist the right hand/wrist around and around, and the loop will tighten itself.

6. Stop twisting when hands are secure and still comfortable.  Be aware and do not cut off circulation.

7. Release the hands by twisting the right hand in the opposite direction from Step 5, and the loop will loosen.

8. This method works equally well to tie hands in front or behind the back.

I practiced this method on myself before using it with my sub partners.  Because it allows choice of release, it does not provide a sense of complete helplessness that some selfbondagers desire.  I prefer that my subs err on the side of caution.

Do any other Doms use selfbondage with their subs?

I have used a mix of traditional titles and my own names for the bondage positions described in this article.

Positions I like best

Presentation:  This is a basic position that begins many of my D/s scenes.  My sub is gagged and standing with hands tied behind her back and legs tied apart to a spreader bar.  A variation would be her arms tied over her head and/or for her to be suspended with legs tied apart.  This position allows me to see all of my sub and to touch her or discipline her anywhere and any way I want.  If she is clothed, I fondle over and under her clothing and/or partially undress her.  If she is nude wearing only stockings and heels (most often), I can see her arousal and play freely with her tits/pussy/ass, bending her at the waist for a standing fuck if I wish.  I can also easily add a crotch rope.

Y Spreadeagle:  My sub is gagged and lying face up nude on a bed.  Her wrists are tied over her head and are attached to the headboard or a strap around the mattress.  Her legs are spread widely with ankles tied to the corner bedposts or strap around the mattress.  Her breasts, pussy and clit are clearly displayed and accessible for oral stimulation and/or discipline with flogger or riding crop.  A pillow/cushion under her ass can be added for fucking.  This is a variation of the more commonly known X spreadeagle where the arms are spread and tied to the corner bedposts or mattress strap.  I prefer the Y spreadeagle because I can untie my sub's ankles and turn her over for a doggy style fuck in pussy or ass while she is still gagged with hands tied to the bed.

Frogtie:  My sub is nude and gagged with her hands tied behind her back and her ankles tied to her thighs.  She is upright sitting/kneeling with her thighs spread.  This is a good position for her to give me head if I have used a ring gag.  She can also be positioned facedown with knees, chest and head on the bed/floor for pussy/anal play and/or fucking.  A variation with hands bound to her waist allows her to be positioned on her back for breast/pussy/anal play and/or fucking.

Damsel in Distress:  My sub is lying on a bed/sofa/floor.  She is gagged, hands tied behind her back, and ankles tied together.  She may be clothed or nude.  If clothed, I fondle and partially undress her.  If nude, she has a crotch rope.  I enjoy watching my sub squirming/rolling in her bondage and listening to her muffled noises.

I have not yet discussed several traditional bondage positions: pole tie, chair tie, and hogtie.  I use these less frequently because I feel they limit access to my sub, and they limit her ability to squirm for me as I enjoy.  I know that others may find these, and many other positions not mentioned, enjoyable.

As always, I speak for myself in my blog entries, and I request feedback/comments so I can learn from the thoughts and experiences of others.  Thank you for reading.

My satisfaction and pleasure will be derived from your submissiveness and the pleasure you get from being my submissive. A key element of our mutual satisfaction will be honesty about our reactions/feelings to our D/s scenes.  I want your pleasure and orgasms to be real so I expect you to tell me if any of our activities are not truly stimulating and for you to help me understand what changes to make so that you do climax.  I will give you the same honesty about my reactions.

The following are my desires for our D/s scenes:

Bondage: I will tie you up and gag you. To me, there is nothing more arousing than the sight of my submissive tied up and squirming helplessly for me to do as I please unless it is her muffled noises/words through the gag. I will tie you hand and foot, spreadeagle, standing, sitting in a chair with legs over chair arms and many other ways. I will use cleave gags, ball gags, tape gags, and others.  I will fuck you while you are tied. I very much enjoy tying up my submissive's pussy with a tight crotchrope. I will take you out in public with the crotchrope on under your clothes. Adult toys of all types would be used.

Breasts/Nipples: I will tie up your tits with rope, nylon stockings or elastic bands as toys for me to lick, suck, slap, and fuck. I will take you out in public with your tits tied up under your clothes. I will ask you to wear tube tops, halter tops, and other clothing that allows easy access to your tits.  I will use fingers, nipple clamps and clothspins to pinch your pretty nips. I will tie your nipples with string or small elastic bands. Adult toys of many types would be used.

Instructions: You will have to ask my permission before you can cum. I like to tease so I may not allow your release right away. I will give you instructions during our play together and for times we are apart.  These may include but are not limited to: what to wear or not wear, how to strip for me, whether or not you may play with yourself and how, when you may or may not cum, and questions that I expect you to answer completely and honestly. I believe in the importance of discipline, and I will expect that my instructions be followed completely and immediately. Failure to do so will result in penalties that include use of a riding crop and/or orgasm denial. I do believe in safe, consensual play so you would have a safeword that I would respect without question.

First questions

I would like to know more about you and your desires before continuing your education as my submissive. I expect your answers to be complete and detailed. Your goal is to make my cock rock hard and make me spray my jism everywhere as I would over your bound body.

1. Describe how long you have been interested/involved in BDSM activities.

2. Tell me when and how you first knew you were submissive.

3. Describe the first time you were tied up. If it is a different event, also tell me about the first time you were fucked in bondage.  If you have never actually been tied up, tell me your first bondage fantasy.

4. Finally, I want you to be playing with your tits, nipples, pussy and clit while you compose your answers to my requests, and I want you to tell me how many times you came.