I have a huge ponygirl fetish or I should say ponysissy. In my fantasy, I had DD breasts, castrated with a 1 inch cock, leather harness that hides nothing, arms fastened behind my back, horseshoe boots and pulling a sulky in a race. I am bound and determined to win the race because first prize in the race is a night in a stall being bred as a mare by all the ponyboy stallions. Being the sissy faggot I am, I would make a great mare for breeding.
It is really diffculti to describe but I will try. First of all, understand everyone's mileage varies when their testicles are shut down or removed. As I started taking the Siterone I noticed even the twitches I would get in my panties were decreasing. Just having my limp penis twitch would be like a massive erection for a man. I also noticed that I was beginning to have to make myself go on Tumblr to look at porn. And I also noticed that the porn was turning me on less and less. I'm not sure how long it took but one day I was looking at Tumblr and nothing. No reaction whatsoever. I could have been looking at pictures of nature and had more of an emotional reaction. I also realized when my wife would be leaving the house to fuck one of her boyfriends I wasn't feeling anything. Normally I would feel excited (still no erection) knowing a man would be fucking her and humiliated because I was incapable of fucking her. Now, like I said, nothing. I've said elsewhere my wife rarely and I mean very rarely meets men here at home. It's just something we agreed on when she fucking four or five men a week. But there is one man who she sometimes brings home and even spends the night occsionally. He started out just another cock but he has become a friend, too. He's also bi and doesn't mind me watching sometimes. I asked my wife to bring him home as a test to see what watching was like being chemically castrated. What I discovered is it was no different than watching them dance would have been except he was putting a bodypart inside her. Plus I just didn't understand why they were doing it. As I said at the start YMMV but with the lack of testosterone, my brain just was not understanding what the attraction to sex was or why bother to do it. Just to follow through we followed through as normal. After theyrested I sucked his cock hard and he fucked my ass. In the past sucking him would excite me and him fucking me and cumming in my ass in front of my wife was humiliating. Again nothing other than thinking aren't you through yet? So what does it amount to? I have no sexual desire at all and with the lack of testosterone I don't even understand why people even want sex. Since my testicles are going bye-bye soon, I won't ever want it or understand it again.
It was summer, I was just barely 13. I was on my knees, holding the 12 year old boy next door by his butt cheeks with his cock in my mouth. I didn't realize it but as I was feeling around it with my tongue exploring it, I was driving him to an orgasm. He grabbed my head, shoved his hips forward and started shaking. I really think if I hadn't had a good hold on his cheeks, he would have gone to the floor. You see, we had been talking about the rumor going around that the 13 year old girl across the street would give blowjobs to older boys. So we were talking about what a blowjob would feel like and, since we were at my house alone, it got to a "I will suck yours if you suck mine." I went first because I really wanted to try sucking a cock to see if I liked it. Now I had blown him and it was his turn. He was a little reluctant but he did go ahead. I wasn't thinking about warning him when I started to cum and when I started cumming in his mouth, his eyes got real wide. He jumped up and barely made it across the hall before he threw up in the toilet. Of course we were both embarassed so he went home. We didn't get together for three or four days but finally he came over after my parents left for work. We kind of talked around the elephant in the room until he finally said he didn't like giving a blowjob but it felt good when I blew him. I thought for a few seconds and told him I liked doing it. We both were quiet for a minute of so when he asked "want to do it again?" That's when I basically became his blowjob bitch for the next three years until we moved when I was 16. Nobody thought it was unusual for us to be together so much since the rest of the kids on our street were girls and the only boys were two bullies on the street behind us. We avoided them like the plague. Any idea how many times a 13-14-15 year old can cum in one day. I think the most I sucked his cock in one day was five times. I tried to figure out once how many blowjobs I gave him in just over three years. We would average anywhere between 10 and 15 per week in the summer but probably only 3 or 4 a week during school. So let's say it averaged out to 5 a week. That's 52 weeks a year plus 2 months additional or 8 weeks for a total of 164 weeks. Averaging 5 times a weks for 164 weeks would be 820 blowjobs. If it was 4 times a week 656 and even just 3 times a week would be 492. Let's just take the lower, round it off and say 500 blowjobs. How many 16 year olds could say they had given 500 blow jobs before they were a junior in high school. We had some girls in our class who were promiscuous but I am sure I was the biggest slut in my entire class.
Oh, and the girl across the street? Yes she was blowing older boys and her mom caught her. I always wanted to talk to her and compare notes on the best way to get boys to cum but I never did.
As I've posted, I'm scheduled to be castrated in March and there really is a medical reason for this. However, one of my wife's boyfriends seems to be excited by this. He is the one who bought me the new supply of cyproterone acetate with enough to up the dosage to make sure I stayed chemically castrated and impotent. It's not a normal occurrance for my wife to entertain a man here at home but he's actually asked her about doing so. She had her phone on speaker the other night and I heard them talking about meeting here the evening of the day I'm castrated. He said it would be appropriate for her to be fucked by a man with a set of balls that day. I don't know if they are going to but I will say this. He does have a huge set of balls.
And have my insurance pay for it! Seriously. When I was a child, I had an undescended testicle and the doctor performed a orchiopexy to bring the testicle down out of my abdomen. What's happened though is that testicle has atrophied and moved back up into the abdomen making it impossible to check it for cancer which is important since the risk is about 10 times greater than normal. And because mine was up high in my abdomen, my risk is greatest. Also, there is a risk, not as high but still a risk, to the other testicle for cancer. Now with a testicle ascended on one side, as an adult the normal procedure is a unilateral (one side) castration. In other words, removal of one testicle. But, since I've been having some pain in the other I'm hoping the doctor when I see him will agree to a bilateral castration. I'm so excited there is even a slim possibility I may soon be a eunuch. It's so wonderfully humiliating that lately when I get to watch my wife having sex with men my little dicklette doesn't even get hard any longer. Having her lovers know I'm impotent is such a wonderful feeling but the thought of her lovers knowing I'm impotent and a castrated cuckold wimp just makes me giddy.
If you look in my gallerys you will find pictures of Kay Milton getting her pussy electrically shocked into orgasms. I decided to use my TENS unit to apply electricity to my ass, prostate and my small limp cock. Here is my blog about it.
New blog entry on how to ruin your wife for sex with you, expecially if you are on the small side like I am. It's how I turned my wife into a size queen when it comes to cocks.
This was just the way I planned, my exact intention
I got so brave, his dick in hand, lost my discretion
It's what I like to do, just wanna try you on
I'm curious for you caught my attention
I sucked a dick and I liked it, the taste of his creamy white cum
I sucked a dick just to try it, I hope my wife don't mind it
It felt so wrong, it felt so right, don't mean I'm in love tonight
I sucked a dick and I liked it, I liked it
No, I don't want to know your name, it doesn't matter
You're my experimental game, just human nature
It's just what faggots do, just how we should behave
My head gets so confused, make me obey
I sucked a dick and I liked it, the taste of his creamy white cum
I sucked a dick just to try it, I hope my wife don't mind it
It felt so wrong, it felt so right, don't mean I'm in love tonight
I sucked a dick and I liked it, I liked it
Sissies we are so magical, soft skin, red lips, so fuckable
Hard to resist, so touchable, too good to deny it
It ain't no big deal, it's innocent
I sucked a dick and I liked it, the taste of his creamy white cum
I sucked a dick just to try it, I hope my wife don't mind it
It felt so wrong, it felt so right, don't mean I'm in love tonight
I sucked a dick and I liked it, I liked it
I found a quiz online that determines what kind of cuckold you are from four categories. They are the Sissy GF Cuckold, the Sexually Useless Cuckold, the Passive Cuckold and the Active Slave Cuckold. This is my score:
You Scored as sissy gf cuckold
you are a slutty little girl wanabe, so you understand how important it is for your wife to be delt with by a real man. sometimes you even double date with her and get treated and like the slutty girl you are.
sissy gf cuckold 100%
sexualy useless cuckold 100%
pasive cuckold 67%
active slave cuckold 17%
The top two categories showing 100% means I tied between sissy gf and sexually useless cuckold. Both are accurate since I have double dated with her (actually several menage a trois fluffing her boyfriends and cleaning up afterward). Add to that a cock which, on the rare occasion it gets hard, is still less than 3 inches and is usually about 1 inch and limp as week old lettuce. Something like that certainly adds up to sexually useless. As far as 67% passive cuckold goes, I sometimes help fasten her stockings to her garterbelt, pick out her clothes to wear, help with her makeup and even make suggestions about what lingerie to buy at the store ("John would like that on you" or "Bill would drool seeing you in this.") I kiss her goodby when she's leaving to visit a lover and tell her to have a good time. I kiss her when she gets back knowing she's sucked his cock and ask if she had fun. I would call that pretty passive. Finally since we really aren't into the domme/sub roles, 17% active slave is about right. I think it's pretty accurate for just a 12 question quiz.
For quite some time to begin with my wife would come home and give me a blow by blow or stroke by stroke description of her latest date with a man and I admit I got quite hard while listening to her describe how she was fucked that night. Plus she kept a diary of all the men she met and how good, great or sometimes how bad the sex was. Reading this got me really going also. Gradually the descriptions and the diary tapered off so I could only imagine what went on. As time has gone by, I began to notice that about the only time I got an erection was when she was on a "date" and I knew she had a man deep in her body. The last coupe of times she's beem out, I've noticed no reaction in the "junk drawer." Hmmmm, maybe the ability for an erection is gone forever or maybe I could try some cialis. Since I don't have sex with anyone and she only with her boyfriends, erections are not that important but I must admit I like the frustration of having nothing to use an erections on (except maybe Rosy Palm and her five sisters on the rare occasion that I do masturbate. I always like it when my wife goes out with man after man because I allow myself 3 masturbations for each man she fucks. So maybe some cialis so that I can have an erection with nothing to use it on while she allows men, instead of wimps like me into her body.
