More ass adventures part I: Toys - choose carefully
There are lots of toys available for butthole play and following from my last post (a long time ago now) I purchased a jelly dong: a Gelee with suction cup. Hands free (well hands free to play with things other than the dildo) certainly was lots of fun. This thing felt good and stretching when riding. It was advertised as 5.7cm in diameter but is quite soft so probably not quite as big an effect as advertised. Certainly was some great sensations when using it but although advertised as phthalates free it came with quite a strong smell and after a couple of outings started to feel quite sticky to the touch. I've read, and it makes sense, that this stickiness is a sign that the material is breaking down so - although fun to use I ditched it determined not stick only with silicone toys or more natural objects for anal play from now on.
When I bought the jelly dong I also bought a douche seeing as clean butthole is yummy butthole and decided on a basic alifornia Exotics douche/enema. Just a small, squeezabl plastic container with an insertable tube end. This was advertised as easy to use - it wasnt and was in short hopeless - holes all down the insertable tube means it hard and messy to use - used it once and ditched it and went back to the improvised squeeze sauce/mustard bottle (small size) I'd been using previously - one with a conical screw tip that actually works really well.
So of the two ass play purchases I made one was fun but didn't last long and the other just didnt work for me at all - not the most successful purchases.
....next post More ass adventures part II: the silicone dildo, the bulb douche, the mandarin, the cucumber and the butt plug.
Well after a bit more fooling round with my butthole .......
and coming to the realisation that my concerns about becoming too loose were pretty much unjustified
- I 've decided I might like to try something a bit bigger.
Yep - its not often someone says I'll go for something smaller and I've changed my mind.
I think anal play is totally hot and after a sessoin or two with my plug and other improvised objects I'm thinking maybe a slightly bigger (not extreme by any interpretation) toy will be fun.
But not a plug I'm thinking more of a dong. I recently had a play with a 42mm diameter object and if felt so damn good and totally hot stretching all the way in and out again. A completely different sensation to a plug. So I think I'll be pilaging the piggy bank and soon be having a new anal toy to play with.
After recently embarking on a bit of anal play (not as a completely inexperienced player) with a 45mm butt plug I found it so enjoyable I
wanted to play more and more. However what I've noticed is my butt is more loose than it used to be. Not drastically but noticably and
this is after only a couple of play sessions - so I've got this great toy but I'm a bit hesitant to play with it too much out of concerns
about whether the loosening will increase with use and if so how much. (Before going on I should be clear here this is loosening as
opposed to issues of faecal incontinence. Also to be clear when I write 'looseness' I'm not meaning a gaping, openness but more a greater
pliability, a feeling of less tightness.)
I read a few articles before buying and using the toy and concluded from them that anal play when done right is a harmless, usually
pleasurable activity. Due to my curiosity about loosening I decided to do a bit of a trawl round the internet to see what additional
information on the topic I could find.
There is a bit about things anal on the web. I tended to skip past the obvious non-expert forums I came across - ones appearing to be
dominated by mostly ill-informed, judgmental responses to well meaning questions about the effects of anal sex and play. The better ones
I found may be of interest to others so I've included links to the websites/information below. In short, all but one of the sites in the links below - one of them quite a scientific research paper - are clear that safe anal play does not lead to incontinence. Only one site mentions the possibility of a negative effect on bowel control
In terms of additional information regarding my question giving rise to this post: 'Will my butt permanently stretch/loosen from anal
play so that in its normal relaxed state its more loose than it would have been without ever experiencing any anal play and if so by how
much?'
From the websites, I found some comments along the lines of 'why would you expect anal play to stretch your butt permanently if it
doesn't stretch over a lifetime's use'. I find these kinds of comments a bit misleading. After all poo is soft and pliable with a
good diet and healthy system and so as your butt stretches so too the poo compresses and changes shape to fit your butt on the way out
and one thing all experts agree on is poo (or anything) that is hard and dry can lead to poor anal health e.g. haemorrhoids, fissures, etc. But such comments do raise the issue of size, design and consistency of toys and objects played with.
A couple of the sites namely the wikipedia and webmd anal-sex-health-concerns page warn about special safety precautions needed due to
delicate internal skin and lack of natural lubricant making damage of tissue and transmission of infections easier and both raise the
possibilty repeated stretching, particularly with larger objects, may weaken the anal sphincter and negatively affect bowel control.
However, they both mention the importance of lubricant and slow and gentle progress during anal sex and play to reduce the likelihood of
damage and these effects.
It seems from anecdotal evidence of people relating their personal experiences that a bit of loosening is a normal consequence of anal
play. For example in one customer review of a butt plug a woman mentions how enjoyable she finds using the toy but her husband is not
willing to try it '....I loooove it but [he is ] not yet willing for me to try on him, come on guys, loosen up!! lol...'. I'm
assuming 'loosen up' has a double meaning here. There is also the woman who mentions greater relaxation of the anal muscles 'In fact
I've found that when I'm a little constipated, being able to relax my muscles easily helps with a much-needed bowel movement. That's a
bonus, not a problem!' This is something I have also noticed and I suspect she is quite correct when she notes its more likely to be
a healthy side-effect. In addition common sense would lead me to think some loosening will occur: one of the uses for butt plugs is to
loosen the butt in preparation for anal penetration.
So, generally from what I can figure out and what I could find doing a bit of research I think the answer to my question is as
follows:
It seems to be a natural (some might even argue beneficial) consequence that after even a little safe anal play with sensible, reasonably
sized toys you can expect some loosening of your butt. This loosening effect is kind of like losing your anal virginity I guess, there
is no suggestion anywhere that it has any negative impact on you or the way your butt works. You'll simply be a bit more experienced
there, a bit more loose and flexible and more ready for your favourite toy or friend next time you play. However, it seems we do need to
be aware that the bigger and more extreme the toy and the more its used the more stretched your butt is likely to become as evidenced in
the 'bmezine' link. In fact after looking at that its quite amazing, and to me scarey, just how much stretching over time a butt can
apparently do. I found little information on how transient any loosening effect may be. However the fact people can progress in size to
these extreme objects indicates some persistence of a stretched state over time. After all a complete anal virgin is not going to take an
extreme toy on their first try (or quite some trys after) without causing damage.
Personally I think care is needed when selecting size of toy as it would seem just common sense that playing with extreme, body
modifying, very big, unnaturally sized toys and objects will put the user at much greater risk of tissue damage leading to incontinence
and excessive permanent stretching and looseness.
I'm fairly new to anal play but I'm finding it really quite a lot of fun so I think I might try something a bit smaller - its not often
someone says that. The smaller toy will be my regular, use as often as I like, toy and I'll reserve the bigger toy (although by no means
especially big compared to a lot of whats available and is used its big for me) for those occasions when I feel like more of a stretching
and more adventureous play.
So my little review has given me a bit of an answer to my question and it emphasizes how very important it is to follow the advice in the
articles linked below, focusing on the following:
a) Always use soft appropriately shaped (tappered) things for anal entry - the maximum diameter I guess is a personal thing but be aware
as indicated in the bmezine link your body will likely change from the play, how much seems to depend on how big and often you decide to
play and so the amount of change is completely up to you.
b) If it hurts stop. Modify what you're doing: relax, slow down, add lube, whatever - you'll have a pretty good idea of what needs to
change.
c) Lube, lube, lube, lube. Lube seems to me mandatory for anal play. From looking around its clear everyone with any knowledge on the
topic agrees damage can come from dry, hard things being forced - whether its waste out or other things in and out and in and ...
