I was instructed in a comment from an earlier blog entry to write a letter of apology to my wife for behaving like a huffy brat when she was entertaining her ex-husband. The idea tickled Miss Allie, and she instructed me to obey, so here is my letter. She had one further stipulation; that I should write the letter in full awareness that she might, or might not, show it to Jez on Valentine's night when we go and see his band play.

The letter:

Dear Miss Allie,

Please accept my sincere apologies for my pathetic and pointless petulance when Jez called round to see you dress up in the outfit he chose for you to wear at the Valentine's gig. I had absolutely no right to behave in that manner, and I now realize that all I did ostracise myself from you and your sexy display, when if I had simply performed my role as your wimpy, inadequate husband, you and Jez could have enjoyed yourselves much more, I could have been included and enjoyed seeing ou looking so sexy, sensual and happy dispolaing yourself for Jez.

It is utterly pathetic, but my insecurities and huffy behaviour was born of knowing how sexually inadequate I am for you, how Jez always satisfied you and in seeing how much sexier you feel when you are around him still.

Of course, I understand why; Jez is a real man, not a wimp like me, and it is only natural you should prefer him as a sexual partner to me. Besides his broad shoulders, bigger build (in many ways) Jez is also very charismatic, manly, confident and clearly knows how to press your buttons. You two are great together and the sexual chemistry is obvious, where I lack the ability to provide that for you.

In future I will try to behave as I should, and be grateful that Jez calls round as it pleases you in ways I can't. Should you choose to show this letter to Jez, I think it is only right he understands that I am here and now stating that Jez should have no consideration for my status as your husband, and feel comletel free and justified in calling round to spend time with you, doing whatever you both wish. It is none of my business what happens between you two, and I fully acknowledge that when Jez visits he should automatically assume the status of the man of the house, and my role should be to serve you both as either of you wish. Jez should feel free to treat you as his infront of me and I should recognise his right.

Jez is a greater man than me, in fact beside him, I am hardly a man at all, I fully recognise his superiority in all things and wish you both many happy times together, and if I can help with that at all, it would be an honor.

I hope this letter pleases you, although I am terrified you may show it to Jez, it is also right he should enjoy reading how much better he is than me, and how I recognise his right to have you, if that is what you choose.

Yours pitifully, and with absilute devotion,

Reg.