For my entire life, I have always masturbated, and sought any kind of sexual activity I could find (and more importantly get away with in discretion).

Growing up in the Midwest was soul crushing and at times dangerous to be a young pansexual. All boys were supposed to only like girls. Even hinting at the fact that one was not completely straight could mean the difference between making it home safely after school or ending up in the hospital.

My early sexual experiences are best described as a combination of fun and abuse. I remember giving my babysitter oral sex and playing with her pussy. I remember the first time that a boy from the neighborhood and I experimented. I remember the abuse that my father (an alcoholic monster) would allow to happen to me at the hands of he and his friends.

My early past was hard to deal with, especially as a pubescent teenager. It took years to reconcile and eventually in my twenties, I became content and happy with myself. It took moving to the other side of the country and giving myself time to heal and form real relationships for me to find happiness. As soon as I moved out on my own, I knew that I could now be free to live life on my own terms.

College was a life-saver. Although the area I moved too had deeply ingrained homophobia and traditions of gender, the university was a safe space for anyone who was not completely hetero. I soon found a group of fellow deviants and hyper sexual people to party with and explore my deepest held sexual fantasies.

I dove right in. I quite literally went week by week mentally checking off all the things I wanted to experience.

Sex with two girls at the same time: check.

Being spit-roasted by two men: check.

Being passed around like a fucktoy in an adult theater: check.

Seeing my girlfriend gangbanged by a dozen of my male friends: check.

Organizing a cum-drenched bukkake for myself in a seedy motel: check.

There was no end to what I could experience.

Eventually, however, I realized that my desires had to be checked against self destruction. Looking back I am totally lucky that I never got hurt, never contracted an STD, and never ended up in a situation that became scary. Many of my brothers and sisters weren't so lucky.

I eventually settled down and actually got married to a fellow bi/pan lady. We would have two kids, and had a happy and very content relationship for about a decade. Unfortunately, her drug addiction ended our marriage and we eventually split up for good. But during our good times we had a long time mutual boyfriend who is still one of my closest friends. The threesomes we would have every weekend still make me hard thinking about them.

Occasionally she wanted more and we had a nice stable of fellow pervs to come by and use her like the whore she wanted to be. We would attend swinger parties in the area and just bust loose. I found that saving up my desires and having a safe/healthy release was the way to go.

At this point in my life, I am super happy. My new wife is wonderful and totally supports my inner slut. We have a small group of friends that we party with occasionally and I have a regular daddy who has the nicest cock I have ever seen.