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MISTER FOOT-FUCK LATEX MAN ~ The Problem with Fetishists
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Hanging around looking for friends on IFap Chat earlier today, I got a PM from some guy whose very handle included his love of toes reading "Wanna fuck your feet" or thereabouts. I wrote back explaining that I wasn't into being foot fucked as things foot oriented had pretty much been ruined for me by my last boyfriend.
He asked me what had happened, so I told him how I had been involved with this guy who had hidden his fetish from me for the first few weeks. He then introduced it just sort of casually like "Hey let's try this thing I kinda heard about", as though it were just some little whim. Before long he was asking to fuck my feet all the time. The way he did it was that he had me lay face down on the bed with my feet up in the air. He would stand next to the bed, hold my feet together placing his cock between the arches of my feet. He would stroke himself using my feet. He didn't want me to do anything but lay there passively while he pleasured himself. I got no enjoyment at all from this practice, and I couldn't even manage to keep myself interested by masturbating while he did it.
We were together 3 months, and that seems like a long time in hindsight. I don't get involved with guys casually, and I had thought of this as a serious relationship, perhaps the one that might progress to marriage, but his true personality was revealed through his fetish and how he dealt with me about it. I came to find out that he'd had this strong fetish all along, and had pursued me because of my tiny, high-arched feet from the beginning. He had hidden his fetish from me at first, not out of shyness or embarrassment, but in order to establish the relationship with me so that it would be more difficult for me to end it once the true degree of his fetish became known. The earlier part of building our relationship was designed to emotionally ensnare me, not because he truly cared for me.
As time went on, he became more and more focused on satisfying his desires, and less and less focused on me and our relationship. He really wanted to do nothing else sexual with me but fuck my feet, and he treated every other physical intimacy with me as something he had to suffer through to get to the 'good stuff'. Even after I told him that I didn't like this practice, nor get any enjoyment at all from it, he still insisted on subjecting me to it, and became more callus towards my feelings as time went on. I finally realized that he cared nothing for me at all and that this supposed 'relationship' had been nothing but a means to an end for him from the beginning. I broke it off and pretty much told him to fuck off, get lost and never speak to me again. I felt manipulated, hurt and used.
At first Mr. Foot-Fuck Man was sympathetic and supportive, asking questions about the relationship and asking what other sexual interests I might have that we could chat about. He also confessed to having a latex fetish. Over the course of conversation I began to tell him about a chat I'd once had with a Sissy (a rare diversion) where I'd played the Cat Woman. I told him that the 60's Cat Woman, Julie Newmar, was just my kind of woman and really turned me on. He said he preferred the early 90's Cat Woman in 'Batman Returns' because the latex catsuit was hot. I said that I didn't think Michelle Pfeiffer was anywhere NEAR as sexy as Julie Newmar, to which he replied "I didn't give a shit about Her. . .I loved that catsuit".
We had talked a lot about how I saw and enjoyed the Dom/Sub scenario, how I preferred to play my Sub roles as a captured victim, somewhat resistant, not like an obedient pet etc etc. and how I saw it not as sexual objectification but as an interpersonal dynamic between the two people engaged in the scenario. I told him that I thought the trouble with fetishism was that the fetishist became too focused on the THING and lost connection with the other Person. This must have irked him as he began to start pointing the finger at Me, saying that I was engaging in objectification and manipulation in my scenarios and only focused on controling the situation to acheive my aims of satisfaction.
In Psychology we call this chicken shit little tactic PROJECTION. It is the slightly more mature version of the infantile "No I'm not. . . YOU are!" retort often heard on the playground.
I had correctly called him on something that struck a nerve, and an accurate hit, as he'd already copped to it with his comment that it was the latex catsuit and Not Michelle Pfeiffer that he was focused on. Feeling called out and defensive, he tried to characterize me as as 'bad' as himself, when in fact my focus and approach is very different. He's essentially immature and full of shit, and trying to PROJECT his own personality flaws onto others as an excuse for his own shortcomings. Pathetic.
People can enjoy kinky things and practices without being owned by their tastes. True fetishism is a psychological disconnect, where the shoe fetishist would rather have the shoe without the girl than the girl without the shoe. It's an unhealthy condition, and unhealthy people are often defensive and unwilling to accept responsibility, like addicts and drunks. A defensive drug addict will claim that really EVERYONE is an addict, a very common assertion made by addicts, trying to bring everyone else down to their level rather than face the fact that they have a problem, and ought to be pulling themselves Up.
I have often run into a related issue with chat partners here, where they accuse me of not being 'open-minded' enough, or accuse me of being 'controlling'. In truth, I just have my own tastes and things that get me off. I don't like 3 ways, group sex, public sex or humiliation, pee or scat etc. I don't insist that guys share my fantasies with me if it something not to their taste, I would consider that manipulative and rude. But guys will sometimes try to Shame and Guilt Trip me into complying with their desires by accusing me of being controlling. These are the first guys that would run like rabbits from a suggestion of mine that appalled or offended them. Pathetic, manipulative jerks.
Luckily, there are lots of guys who are perfectly happy to share my warped little fantasies with me. I don't have to manipulate or barter with them to play with me, nor do they try to make me suffer through distasteful things in order to get to the things I like. All sexual contact ought to be mutually agreeable, and those trying to be manipulative or coercive are engaging in a sort of mental molestation, or Mind Fuck.
Fuck them!
~ Tabby
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Posted on : Aug 4, 2017
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