Here are two really quick stories: the first one happened to my mother, her name is Julie, when she was in college. She was fot lack of a better term, a slut. In her second year, her and a friend made a bet where they had to see who could have the most one nighters in a month. My mother won, 9 to 6.

The second one is about a friend of Julie's that knew about us. Her picture is on my page. She always told us that we were crazy and fucked up for what we were doing. One day, back in either 2000 or 2001, I thought I would tell her friend about my obsession over my mother's farts. Her friend said to me, "WHAT?! ARE YOU SICK!? Julie has without a doubt the worst smelling farts in the world."