in a strange and powerfully erotic way, the experience of being seduced - body mind & soul - by a student of mine takes me back to my past. When I was 22, I was, so to speak, taken upon by a woman a few years younger than my mother. It was when I was a young student just applying to graduate schools. She was an associate professor in the liberal arts department, ten years my senior.Kimberly.

The experience of watching myself soften and give-in to the erotic proposals of the girl now is similar to those of Kim. Only this time the age difference is reversed, i somehow feel like the younger one here, mostly because the control dynamic is, once again, tipped in the girl's favor. She has me by the [genitals] so to speak. Job. Marriage. Carreer. Reputation. All seems to hinge on her not letting on.

 But the eroticism is palpable. The situation is not one of 'She is going to suck on my penis. Repeatedly. Repeatedly suck me off until i find myself on my knees on her bed panting.'

That's not the situation. The situation is more like, "I literally can't prevent her from sucking on my penis. Repeatedly. Repeatedly sucking me off again and again until i find myself on my knees on her bed panting and begging for rest.."

The situation isn't "Oh god! Is she going to let me screw her doggy-style on our knees in her living room again?"  

The situation is more like, "Oh-Jesus I'm getting rug burns on my knees from screwing her doggy style on the carpet in her living room... am I going to be late for work again?  Still... I know I'm fucking going to do it again... and I want it.. but I kind of have  no choice.."

Erotic like my mind is on fire. Erotic like the curves of her body signify something profound and wicked in how unavoidable they are. Of how I have a hunger to consume and be consumed.

And so i sit here, 37 years old, feeling as powerfully erect and aroused as my former 22 year old self. The self who

discovered he had a nearly inexhaustile volume of semen to burst forth for the joy and amusement of the woman

who teased and encouraged me. 

Kimberly:  "I'm going to get on the bed. And *someone is going to show me how much semen he has saved up since yesterday."

Me: "umm........ uh..... yes!   Yes...."

Kim: "Do you miss your cute little girlfriend? Do you miss dating girls, or do you like women now?"

Me: "I.. can never... go back..."

..one long ago Christmas eve when she and I were staying in a hotel back in my home town, I was supposed to be visiting my parent. Christmas dinner. We were already late and Kim had me lie and tell them we wouldn't be able to make it.

Me: "Are you sure? I havent seen them in like six months, it's kind of a family thing... why don't we just go over there?"

Kim: "Instead of family dinner, looks like you're going to be in a hotel across down ass-fucking. I've been wanting to teach you..."

 And a hapless 22 year old homesick man gave in, oncemore, to the heavy urges hanging between his legs, beating in his chest, haunting his dreams like fire in the night.  My midnight, he had jizzed up her ass twice, and squirted up her back into her hair. He was tired and confused and homesick and hornier than he had ever been in his life. 

Christmas morning meant waking up to a blowjob.