Weird the things you remember at the most random times.  Like today, preparing my lawn for its first mowing of the year, idly pondering the same things I always think when I do that job.

Like how I'd love to make my wife Kelly do it, naked in high heels and shackles, crotchroped to the mower. Staking her out in the sun afterwards on the freshly cut grass and cooling her off with the hose.

Well one of the coping stones has broken off the wall over winter and I wondered if some No More Nails would hold it. Probably not but then I remembered the old adhesive adverts that were on UK television, was it Solvite or Loctite? The premise of the product was that it would stick anything to anything and be secure enough to withstand the toughest tests.

To demonstrate the point they glued the arms and legs of a man in white overalls to a white board with the product and then subject him to some perilous situation like hanging him off the side of a boat and walking over the top side of the board to which he was secured underneath and throw chum to some great white sharks in the water not far below, or catapult him up a very tall mast at high speed. It was meant to be humorous but to a sensitive child like I was it initially made me feel really bad for the guy.

But after a while I'd begin to work it into my fantasies. What if it had been a hot woman glued to the board? What if she only had lingerie on under the white overalls, or better what if it was her lingerie that they'd stuck her to it by? Although in that case, I quickly realised, she'd need some handcuffs holding her wrists and ankles in place otherwise she'd eventually free herself.

From there my mind came back to present day and my more adult mind which whilst not really any more grown up is at least a bit more knowledgeable. The way to do it would be a catsuit, glue her to the board in that. Zip the central zip up and padlock it to the O-ring of her slave collar. Ideally it would be a catsuit that had separate zips for each of her breasts and her crotch... Similar to the type Summer Cummings wears when she's working with House of Gord.

After that I mowed the lawn thinking of Summer's Headlights video where they bound her in just such a catsuit with her big bouncy breasts exposed, to the front of an SUV.

 Yep, weird the things you remember at random times.