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Broken
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Regardless of what number it is, the only slap that really matters is the one that finally floods the levees she’s carefully constructed around her fragile self-esteem and drowns her in the wretched shame of her childhood. The one that breaks the dams she’s built to suppress and keep at bay her mother’s scornful voice and sets her mind aflood with hopeless disdain and rejection. Not good enough. Not pretty enough. Not smart enough. Are you really going to eat that?
All those years of convincing herself that her mother was wrong - that she is worth something, that she does deserve happiness - rendered pointless in the span of a few hours. All that hard work building herself up from scratch, forced to learn how to be a whole human being on her own undone by a single, cruel hand for no purpose other than sport.
Maybe she’ll have the strength and the determination to start all over again. Maybe she’ll find a way to piece together the fragments of the person she’d almost convinced herself that she was.
Or maybe this is the time she breaks for good.
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Posted on : Aug 5, 2014
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