So, for over a month, since the last time I experimented, I'd been pretty damn straight, but then random bits of porn kicked in some of the sissy/gayer side of me again. No idea how long for.

Not sure if it's a side effect of just being lonely and horny - I've had no luck with any of the women I like, I'm not exactly an expert at social situations or asking people out - but getting into a conversation with one of the guys made me horny at the idea of experimenting more. Just a random email asking how he was doing since the last time I'd chatted, and he sent me a pic of his dick getting serviced by 2 young guys at the same time, and some of the fantasies flared up again, ideas on how to try and improve what happened last time. 

I'd have to start to get new "clothes" again I guess (or at least have someone bring clothes/costume for me to try on for them, if they want me dressed - naked I can do), I got rid of basically everything after thinking I should be straight from now on. I'd have to have more anal play, get fingered, opened before I try anal again (jumping right in didn't exactly work).

Now, it'd only be a choice of 2 of the 3 guys (not the first one, that was just a disappointment, and he kept texting me to see if I was bored... not what I wanted at all).

Ah, decisions, decisions. To stick to just dirty fantasies, alone; or to consider meeting up again with someone, see how good a cocksucker or sissybottom I can be....