If you are reading this you are a woman whose man has broached the subject of male chastity, Male chastity is about sexual control. Some men find it amazingly erotic to lose control of when and how often they can ejaculate. That last sentence is the sum total of the male chastity fantasy. The so called real-life stories that abound on the Net are manifestations of that fantasy. Virtually none are written by women. The stories all have a common theme: the man does something naughty (cheating, neglecting his wife, etc.). His wife (lover) gives him an ultimatum that unless he submit to wearing a chastity device, she will leave him. There are endless variations on this theme, but that's the central story.

Any rational wife would leave the man cheats on her or neglects her, not come up with an erotic scenario. This filter alone demonstrates who writes the "real-life story". Other men are more honest in their fantasies. They write that they ask their mate to lock them up to help them be better men. If all it takes to make a better man is to imprison his wee wee, most men would be locked up right now.

What's in it for you?
Before we get down to the how-to's, let's consider the value proposition. If you believe the fantasies, after a few days of penis prison your man will be bringing you flowers, offering oral sex, washing the dishes, and doing the laundry all in the hope you will "release" him and get him off. Do you believe that? If you do, I have a bridge to sell you. The bottom line is that acting out the male chastity fantasy is something you do for him. It is unlikely that any reward will match the work you have to do to sustain his wish to be chaste.

Most real life chastity scenarios play out like this. The man convinces his partner to lock him up and hide the key so he can't find it. He then expects endless teasing and reminders that she controls his sex. He wants you to make up rules and extend his lockup time when he disobeys. Then, after some time, usually when you can't stand the whining, he expects you to unlock him and get him off in his favorite way. Getting the point? Male chastity is all about turning him on, not about providing any benefits to you. Don't believe this? Check out the endless stuff on the Internet. It all follows this basic scenario.

If you love him and want to let him try this form of sex play, then that should be your motive for participation. The reward comes from seeing his pleasure and allowing him the chance to play with sexual control. Just understand that this game is for him. You won't get any direct benefit and you will have to work to make him experience it. If you are willing to do this, read on. Here's how you play the game.

Playing the chastity game
Let's start by understanding what he wants. He will never articulate this, even if he is aware of it, but the game won't work unless you have a clear understanding. Put simply, he wants to safely give up control. Many men find it enormously arousing to have his partner control him sexually. This has nothing to do with his masculinity. It doesn't mean he has some fatal flaw in his personality. Most western males grow up believing that they are expected to be in control, especially sexually. Consider your own feelings. Haven't you always found a man who sweeps you off your feet intensely arousing? The reasons for this fill countless psychiatry books. We aren't interested in the reasons, just the reality. Men also find it arousing for their sexual partners to take control.

Your man may fantasize and dream of you deciding how, when, and where he can ejaculate. He may even imagine you will get aroused seeing his "suffering" as you make him wait to squirt. He has probably read a great many stories about men whose wives put them into chastity. These stories have probably been the inspiration for lots of masturbation. When the desire to make this all real finally gets strong enough to present the concept to you, it has already had a very long time to grow in his imagination. He won't realize that you won't instantly share his excitement.

You are probably at the point that he has made his approach and is hoping you will share his passion for chastity. He may have directed you to chastity stories that particularly arouse him. The fact you are reading this article means that you want to at least consider trying it with him. From here on, we assume you want to give him his wish.

Step one. Preparation
Remember, he has been working this out in his head for a long time. No matter how casual or awkward his approach, this is the culmination of many dreams and masturbation sessions. He will probably try to sell you on the benefits of his chastity to your happiness. Since you have decide to play, agree that it sounds promising. Next, ask him to show you how you can keep him under control. He has probably done endless research on various chastity devices. Let him lead you on a tour of the various web sites that sell chastity devices. Thank him and ask him to give you time to consider your next step. For your own sanity to avoid endless conversations on this subject, tell him not to discuss it again. You will bring it up when the time is right. Strictly enforce this rule. If he tries to discuss it with you, warn him that if he does that again you won't play. It's very important that you control the amount of noise this play can introduce into your life. If you don't set strong limits right from the start, he will fill your life with endless discussions about his chastity. So rule one is no discussion about his chastity or sex without your permission.

The next step is to acquire a chastity device. Without a doubt he has done a lot of research. Disregard it. The endless online discussions about chastity devices center around how inescapable they are. Escape isn't a problem. It's just part of his fantasy. There are very few chastity devices that a man can wear safely without risking detection at work, etc. that won't actually injure him. The best for your purposes is the CB6000 . It's inexpensive and does a pretty good job. The people who make this product also make other, more expensive models. Unless your partner has a penis that is more than 3" long when soft, the other models aren't any better. If he longer when soft, then the "Curve" made by the same people will do the job. You will see that various devices to make the CB6000  more "secure" are for sale. Most of them inflict considerable pain if the man tries to pull his penis out. They also cause pain when he gets a nocturnal erection (pretty all men do while sleeping). A good rule of thumb is that the more secure the device, the less likely it is safe or practical to wear.

It is possible to get the penis out of a CB6000  without unlocking it, but it is very difficult, maybe impossible, to get it back in. It really doesn't matter. This is his game. If he wants to screw it up, he is the one whose fantasy is spoiled. There are some men whose hobby is escaping chastity devices. These men, almost all living alone with no playmate, spend amazing amounts of time and money buying and foiling chastity devices. That is one game you really don't want to play.

Ok, the next step is to order the CB6000 , if that's what you selected. Don't talk about it with him, just order it. He is probably half crazy wondering whether you will make his dream come true. A day or two after you order the chastity device, sit him down and have a talk. This is the moment he has dreamed about for a very long time.

The first conversation
The first discussion will set the tone for the entire chastity experience. It will both provide him with a dream come true, and give you a way to set realistic limits on just how much this will intrude into your life. Remember, symbolism is very important in chastity play. Some of this may seem silly to you. It is silly. But not to him. Block out some time when you can be alone with him. Sit in a comfortable chair. Ask him to sit at your feet. (seems silly but it is setting up the power dynamic)

Next, tell him that you have decided that chastity will be a way he can improve and better please you. Tell him that in the near future the chastity device you ordered will arrive and from that day on, he will wear it. He will try to ask endless questions. Firmly decline to answer any. Just tell him that you will take care of things and he will learn soon enough. Don't be surprised if he has a very strong erection. This is his dream come true. Now set the ground rules:

You have now set the scene for bringing his fantasy to life without making you miserable in the process.

There is little doubt that his interest in sex will grow enormously after this conversation. Indulge him if you wish. Otherwise, just tell him to be a good boy and wait until you tell him you want sex. This is very difficult for many women. Most have been trained from an early age to try to please. In this case, pleasing means withholding not giving in.

The device arrives
The package with the device finally arrives. If it is a CB6000  it will come with both a padlock and plastic seals (they look like tiny locks and have a number stamped on them). The seals make the device undetectable in an airport metal detector. If he isn't traveling, he won't need them. Open the padlock, take the keys and give the package to him. Instruct him to learn how to put the device on and then lock himself in. Tell him to come out naked for your inspection when he has finished.

Ask him to stand in front of you. Check the device and make sure it looks right and isn't pinching anywhere. Your adventure has begun. Undoubtedly during that first inspection he tries to get an erection. If not, a little light ball tickling will do the trick. Check to see that he is in securely and when erect (as much as the device allows) that he doesn't look like he is in pain. Next, tell him that this first experience will last 7 days. If he is a good boy, after a week you will temporarily unlock him and have some fun. If he annoys you in any way, tell him that his sentence will increase by three days for each incident. Sound cruel? It isn't. This is exactly what he had been hoping for.

During this first week have him present himself for daily inspections. This isn't for his pleasure, though he will enjoy it. You will have a chance to assure that he is keeping clean and has no redness or irritation. If you detect irritation, take the device off. If it came with different sized rings, tell him to put it back on with a larger ring. The key is to be sure he isn't injured wearing the device.

First unlocking
After his first lock up time, have a little ceremony. Hand him the key and tell him to take it off. After he opens the lock, get the key back. What happens next is up to you. If you want to make love, go for it. If you just want to masturbate him, that is perfectly fine too. It's all up to you. Whatever release he gets, when finished tell him to lock himself up again. After he is safely locked in, you can tell him when he will next get relief.It's important to tell him when his next chance will be. He will love anticipating it and will love it if you extend it for naughtiness.

That's the game. It's what he has dreamt about. Variations are up to you. If you want him to pleasure you between releases, go for it. If you want him to do chores without complaining, give that a try too. How much real control you have depends on your partner. Don't push it to the point neither of you is having fun.

That's it. You now know what he expects and how to deliver it if you wish. If this isn't what you feel you can do, tell him. Have a heart-to-heart discussion. It's the only fair thing to do. If you do want to try it, he will forever be grateful for the chance to live this fantasy. If you have any comments or questions, please use the "contact us" link at the bottom of the page. This isn't a commercial web site and we want to help. Guys, we won't reply to obvious attempts to get off asking silly questions. Have fun and enjoy the ride.