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A few thoughts on marriage
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Women marry for security, while men often marry merely for the promise of regular sex. The man is inclined to keep his side of the marriage bargain because it is fairly clear. But the woman, having no idea of what the bargain was, is baffled when the man complains.
A man who is tight-fisted makes his caution and lack of generosity into a creed so that it sometimes seems he is expressing self-discipline and neutrality, whereas actually he is indulging himself completely. As a result he will often fail in business, partly through an inability to risk capital, partly through the loss of nerve which comes when security is equated with material goods and well-being. For this man, this materialism extends into his sex life, as is frequently the case. He hopes to get something for nothing if he can (his life is a series of deals) but expects a good return on any expenditure.
He is easily understood and fairly easy to manipulate. Moreover, the woman has some sense of control over the relationship, for such men can also be, on certain levels, highly impressionable: they are nearly all ego. However, his inability, ultimately, to accept responsibility either for himself or others makes him a frustrating partner and his relationships are inclined to deteriorate after a period in which some reform has been attempted on him and he has become resentful. We are changed only by circumstance, never by will alone.
Women, for their part, often possess a self-involved sexuality which contains in it a peculiar coldness: the more it is indulged, the more the coldness grows. One meets libertines whose lives are devoted to sex and yet who have gradually lost any sexual generosity. Certain women are the same. They cease to celebrate and come more and more to control. It is the inevitable progress of rationalized romance.
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Posted on : Dec 8, 2012
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