By that terrible word play, I mean that I'm pretty much into anything.

I've never been honest about what gets me hard, not even to my therapist, not even to myself, but I figure if I could explain it to anyone, it would be the sick, perverted, wonderful fappers of the ImageFap image boards. My kind of people.

I like boobs and girl-butt. Big tits, round and soft. All the girls I've slept with were large titted vixens, and I work their funbags like a baker kneeding bread. Circular squeezes, apply pressure and grind, lick and suck the nipples, tickle the areola, I love it. Those girls say I'm good with my hands, that's the key.

I also love eating pussy. Some people find it unpleasant because of smells or taste, but I say who the fuck cares. I'm not doing it for me, I'm doing it so she can be held down and be made to cum her brains out. Although I do do it for myself, cause I like to make girls cum. To hear them breath hard, to feel them spasm against my body, to feel their pussies contract uncontrolible in my mouth. I love it! And woman are SO appreciative when you make them cum. That's how you control a woman, liquify their brains with oral sex.

But I have a dark secret, I also like dong. Big long pulsating cocks. That makes me just as hard. I've had a few gay fuck buddies in my time, don't tell my uber-religious family. I just love how the cock looks. I love putting them in my mouth, having then pound my ass. Especially huge cocks, the first cock in my ass was an 8-inch beast from this older anonymous daddy. He fucked me doggy style and came in my asshole. It was both painful and amazing, this must be what it's like for a woman the first time, I feel very in touch with my feminine side, obviously.

But the darkness continues. Tits and cock? Damn right I love the Shemales! The Dick Girls! The Trannies! The Futanari! The grace and beaty of a woman with the raw sexual energy of a man. It's the future of sexuality. I especially love seeing dick girls drilling guys. The dynamic is switched, but the eroticism is doubled. I really hope to have a gorgeous tranny one day.

And it doesn't stop there, my darkness has no end. but I'll save that for later, don't want to shock you all at once...