When I made an account on this site, I mentioned fantasies among my interests. I got a few messages from people about that and I thought I would post some of my thoughts. 

First, I will get the silly stuff of my chest. I got a few rude messages from some people who questioned what I was doing on this site if I wasn't interested in posting pictures and just wanted to talk. I don't understand why someone might go out of his way to send me a message like that when I am not bothering them. I am just doing what I like. I like looking at porn, but maybe it doesn't matter to me as much as it does to others. I am not here because I am dissatisfied with my real life. On the contrary, I have a wonderful life and I am only here to explore other aspects of my sexuality. I don't need to do that, I am doing it because I want to. And so I should be able to do it the way I want to without people questioning my choices or insulting me.

One reason why I find sharing fantasies with people or just talking to them to be more satisfying than looking at pictures or posting my own is that I find the enjoyment I get from pictures to be not as subtle. I think that is what is great about doing something like this over the internet. If I just want to have sex, there's real life for that. On the other hand, connecting to people non-physically like this makes me understand the subtle aspects of my sexuality. That is why I find words and thoughts to be better than pictures. (I don't mean to say that I don't like looking at pictures at all. I do. But that's not what I am looking for really.)

Since this is about looking at something subtle, I find it necessary to do it carefully. But I found to my amusement that some people don't have any idea about how to talk about something sexual in a stimulating way. If someone wants to share a fantasy and they start with something like "I am licking your breasts" or "I am stuffing your face with my cock"... for me that is like the verbal equivalent of premature ejaculation!

For me, a fantasy needs to be gone through like writing a proper story. In fact, I find it to be good practice to writing an erotic story (though that is not the reason why I like to do it). It has to have a background. The details, even if they seem irrelevant to the sexual part of it, help make it all so much more satisfying. You are trying to convey a situation in your mind to someone else. If you want them to feel it as intensely as you are feeling it, you have to bring it to life for them. This is not about skill with language (though that does help... and so does good grammar and spelling). It is about being willing to make the effort. And it isn't just about saying a lot of dirty words. It is about being genuinely open about your sexuality. So you have to look inside at what excites you and try to bring it to life. That's the only way you can bring it out in the open for someone else to share. 

Of course, that is only one part of it. The other thing is you are sharing. So you have to look at how the other person is feeling as well. It is just like sex in real life. It is much better if you don't make it just about yourself. In fact, if you become sensitive to the other person, you end up enhancing your own enjoyment of it. 

After a few failed experiments with some people, I got a message from Stefan (username: Nafetss). I don't think he was used to thinking about this like me to begin with, but he quickly caught on to what kind of sharing I was looking for and adjusted to it. For a lot of people, sharing fantasies seems to mean exchanging dirty sentences for half an hour or so and they hope to get some sort of sexual satisfaction out of it (?). Wouldn't that get old very fast? On the other hand, it is so much more satisfying if you do it gradually, making sure you are creating a vivid picture of what you feel and work through the fantasy over a period of days rather than minutes.

It was really nice to talk to someone who was willing to think about it like this. And it was such a wonderful experience for us. I mean, it wasn't just about a quick masturbation session at the computer. It was a genuine exploration of sexuality that took a while but it was such a huge turn-on! And it wasn't just about the sexual satisfaction. We actually became more open with each other and really started enjoying each other's company. 

Okay, I admit that doing it like this might be dangerous for people who find it hard to separate fantasy from real life. But then, that's their problem.

I am only sharing this because I know that I am not the only one who enjoys exploring fantasies. People who find it stupid or whatever and prefer to stare at an unending stream of pictures of tits and pussies can keep their opinions to themselves, please.