Short back story: My wife cheated on me for about a year before I figured it out. I didn't let on that I knew until around a year later when she figured out I knew. I actually forced the issue by intercepting her from showering after coming home late one night and doing down on her pussy full of her lover's cum. Pretty much brought it out in the open!  This happened about six years ago or so...

After an awkward week, we went to a small bed and breakfast inn, just the two of us. I figured it was make or break time: we either came clean in what was going on or we would break up. In order to relieve any tension that may build up while reading this, I will reveal that we didn't break up..

We talked alot. We compared notes. We laughed. We cried. We made love. She said that she was sorry that it happened. I confessed that I knew and let it go on and encouaged her, even. We were amazed by how we both acted and reacted. We both feared that we would lose the other, but we were relieved that neither wanted that. We made a commitment to each other to live the cuckold lifestyle and to live for each other...

(Eventually, I'll start from the begining and get down the full story. That's why I wanted to do this blog to begin with...)

One breakthrough happened near the end of our weekend. We were both lounging in a hot tub built for two that was in our room. I slowly ran my hands over her body while she curiously cupped my nuts and just held them. We talked about the pros and cons of the lifestyle change we were about to start. I kinda amazed my wife with what I came up with. How could I not: I had a whole year secretly living a cuckold life! We came to a verbal agreement of what we would do or not do. I'm sure as I write this down, I'll remember more about what we talked about, but here is the bulk of what we agreed to:

We revowed out commitment to each other. Before we first got married, we agreed that if the other wanted out of our relationship, better to admit it than live a lie. We agreed that we were NOT at this stage and we both wanted to stay together.

Although my wife said had a so called "Hall Pass" (to use the current movie title), I assured my wife that I did not want to have sex with other women. I did not want a swingers lifestyle. This is mostly due to me and my small cock. Despite my wife's assurances and all the stuff I read, I feel very insecure about my penis size. That's probably why I can flirt and talk pillow talk so well, as I know that if push comes to shove, I wouldn't go through with it. (Although I have shagged two other women since this day: stories for another time). My hang up...

I, too, gave my wife a "Hall Pass". I assured her that I did not think she was slut, loose woman, whore, or any other derogatory term. I assured her that I found her a strong, intelligent  beautiful woman. If she chose to let a man into her life and share her body, I know that that man is special. After hearing her story about her lover, I couldn't agree more: her first lover sounds like a great guy!

I also assured her that her body is hers to do what she pleases. I told her that I knew I had a small penis, and dispite her assuances, I said that I did not mind if she sought another man out, hopefully a man with a bigger cock. After many reassurances that my penis was fine, I told her that we were just going to go around and around on this issue. Bottom line: Her body. Her choice to take a lover.

(We stopped to fuck, as this big cocked lover stuff got me really hard and my wife said, "No sense wasting a good erection!")

Back in the tub, as she held my shrunken cock, we talked consquences of this lifestyle.

My wife's lover worked at the same place she did. She is very high up and in a powerful position, and he was likewise. Although they we're being discreet, they both had to be careful of a whisper campaign or other jealousies that could ruin their jobs. This I had to leave pretty much up to my wife. The professional circles she was in are way different than mine. I rarely went to her office events (mostly because of my job) and the few I did, everyone was amazed to meet me, saying that they thought I wasn't real (all in jest, I believe). If the knowledge came public that she was having an affair, it could ruin her career. As for my job, it would be embarrassing, but not career ending.

We also wanted to keep this from our familes and friends. Them being somewhat religious, they wouldn't understand. The less people who knew, the better. This is a conintuing problem.

She knew her first lover long before they had an affair, but I still always wanted her to let me know where she was, or at very least let her best friend know. Last thing I wanted was a visit from the police that they found her body somewhere. (This has actually gotten easier with the GSP in cell phones). At the time, she didn't figure on having another lover, but I told her to always be wary and do a background check. (Now it's easier with all the on-line sites).

I wanted her to be tested for STD's and HIV, as would I. Just becase he says he is only with my wife doesn't mean he hasn't done this with other women. And we continue to be tested every 6 months or so.

As I had had a vasectomy, she had to be on some sort of birth control. I knew she was letting him come inside her, and a baby is not something any of us wanted. She is on the pill and uses condoms with new lovers.

One non-negotiable item: My wife had to tell me about what happened. Every single detail. She had to understand that while she gets her pleasure from sex, I get mine from hearing about her having sex. She often delivers her details while we are having sex or she's giving me a hand-job. If she snuck around, it would be very hard to forgive, as she has carte blanche to do whatever she wants.

One non-negotiable thing for her. I was not allowed to meet her lover or watch them have sex. This was, and still is, a hard for me to accept, as I really want (to be blunt) to see another man fuck my wife! I want to sit back and watch her orgasm while another man does her. She adamantly has said NO, and her reasons are many and varied. I think for most part, sex is a private thing for her and she feels it's cheapened my making it a specator sport. She also ruled out three-somes, swinging, and even me meeting her lover! Fears we may agree to something she won't, and she's probably right. To this day, I have never seen her have sex with another man.

I also assured her that she had and has final say as to whether to take a lover or not. It's her body, after all! I will support her, and also hurt anybody who crosses the line. I may have a small cock, but I ain't got a small body...

At the time we did this, we said that she was not to stay at his place overnight. This has changed as she has not only stayed with him overnight, but she has taken trips, both business and personal with him, and she even spent most of Jan, 2011 with him at his place! So as time progressed, we could change things if we talked about it before hand.

We also talked about many sexual things. My wife didn't want to do anal, however she has since let her lover do it. (not me, though!). She didn't want to do women, although she was shocked that I said if you got me sexed up enough, I could do a man. No bondage. Heck, my wife's intital reaction to everthing is NO! Case in point:

Years later I told her that I really like it when she roughs up my balls. She didn't want to do it. Gradually she made the connection that when she does hit, kick, squeeze, rap, pinch, punch, knee, squish, squash, or paddle my balls, I get a very quick, very hard erection, and generally will fuck her until she can't walk. So now she will give me all forms of CBT. she won't, however, tie me up and spend an afternoon just seeing how much my balls can take. I'm willing to let her try (with the proper safe word, of course). She's not interested.

Things change, too. She used to leave me restained on our bed (with a TV and remote) when she went out on a date until we read in a Dan Savage column how dangerous that can be. So we quit (although I did suggest she could let her BF cuckold-sit me! Didn't get much milage out of that idea, but who knows...)

But I'm boucing all over the place! Back at our hot tub, we realized that we had spent 4 hours talking about this and that it was dinner time! We got out, dried each other off, she got me really horny with a slow blow job, but didn't finish me as she wanted to go eat. She never finished the BJ, but we did make love later that night.

(My wife is reading over my shoulder and asks me "How the fuck do you remember all this?" I told her, I remember everything she has every done to me! I asked her if she remembers me blowing my load in her mouth for the first time. She says no and throws her hands in the air and left. FYI: It was in college, and she was giving me an incredible blow job in her parent's basement on the "Couch that it's probably a good thing it can't talk". I held her head down as I felt my load blow into her mouth! Oh, it felt good! When she got up, I kissed her, forcing her mouth open and making her snowball me! She was stunned at this (As much as she did in her college days, this was her first snowball!) She broke away quickly and went to spit out my gift to her. To this day, I don't beleive she has ever swallowed my cum...)

That weekend cemented our cuckold lifestyle, and she has been cucking me every since. As long as she comes home to me and assures me that it's only sex and not love, I'm OK. And she is slowly willing to try new things! Like me currently in my CB-6000S for the last three weeks. I always wanted to try it (and as most things, the internet stories makes it sound better than it really is). She kinda likes me being all mushy and working hard to please her (especially orally! hey now), although she does say I get too needy. She was going to keep me locked up for 30 days, but she's going to let me out this weekend. She wont say why, just that Saturday night we're going out. Which is odd, as that's usually when she goes out with the guy she's currently with. They are going out tonight, though, so maybe it's just timing!

Enough story for today! Next time, I'll try to start at the begining. The story will be first from my perspective, then from hers, as I learned stuff from the weekend above and fit it together.