A university class sit restlessly in the lecture theatre awaiting the arrival of their ever knowledgable teacher. He arrives only moments late wearing his flawless white coat and as usual sporting his thick black framed glasses. The class cease their idle banter and await their teacher's valued sermon.
"Life"
The teachers begins as he turns his back to the class and begins the scrawl the word in large letters on a chalk board.
"And how to live it, the test of the modern mind as it seems"
He turns back to face his students, all with equally puzzled expressions at this change in course criteria.
"What is life about? What is life's purpose? What can be determined as actually a life and not just a presence? ...Do any of you know?"
A solemn shrug besets the class as every student ponders the question.
"Of course you dont. You are all young and haven't nearly the experience to determine what is worthwhile in life and what is merely another tedium. But who can tell me the formula for a good life?"
A subsonic murmour rumbles through the theatre as the students ponder amongst themselves and their peers the formula to a good life. A boy in the 2nd row raises his hand cautiously.
"Lead a healthy mental and physical life, set high morals and standards, and to not except anything less than what you feel is deserving of you" He says
The teacher nods with an accepting grin on his face and points to another young man towards the back of the room.
"To work hard and achieve financial security for you to live out your dreams"
The teacher nods again and this time points to a girl towards the front with her hand raised in the air.
"To lead a sound and heathly personal life and raise a family to carry on your legacy"
The teacher smiles and heads back to his table at the front of his room.
"All perfectly good responses, no better or worse than any other human could say. But none the less they are still all flawed in some way"
The teacher reaches into his drawns and produced a number of items which he lays on the table. A medium sized glass beaker, a small purple pouch, a plastic container of what appeared to be sand, and another container of what seemed to be flour.
"Now my students, imagine this glass beaker here is your life, in birth you have no obligations or responcibilities, no wants or needs above that of the primal urge for survival so essentialy your life is empty and your only purpose is existence in itself until you are of an age in which your are mature enough to makes choices about the direction and purpose of your life"
The Students all seem to nod and murmour in agreement.
"Now imagine that this flour here is all the personal, and emotional aspects of your life"
He says as he pours some flour into the beaker filling it somewhat.
"Friendships, family, happyness, fear, pain, joy, ambivilance, confusion, curiousity, yearning, and depression. All big parts of life and all the results of things that happen in life. Without one we cannot have the other and so these are essential to a good life in that they help define our character and help add interpersonal rewards to things we may do in life"
The class seem to agree.
"Now my pupils, imagine that this sand represents all the spiritual aspects of your life"
The teachers says as he pours sand into the beaker and only leaving a small amount of room left at the top.
"Life's very purpose and actions can be made all the more rich and meaningful when working towards a grand purpose, and zeal never held any body back. Have a strong spiritual connection is important for morale and support in life, otherwise it can add a pointlessness to the day to day rat race that many people are sucked into and never escape from. Life needs purpose, and purpose that is grand and epic in a way that material or physical rewards can never quite replace. Every civilisation on this planet is heavily based upon some sort of spiritual and relgious basis so there is no denying the benefits of a strong spiritual presence in ones life"
Again the students whisper to each other and nod, seemingly concurring with the words of their teacher. The teacher opens up the purple puch and pours some of the contents into his hand.
"Now, these small quartz pebbles represent all the material needs in life"
He says as he pours them into the beaker, being careful not to let any spill over the top. The beaker is quite full now.
"Material needs, especially in this time that we live in, have become a staple of human achievement and moral. Small rewards help keep the spirit up and help remind us that all of our hard work is not wasted on some grand scheme to be played out in the distant future. Material needs also count on the house that we must live in, the bed we must sleep in, the clothes we must wear, and all the other things necessary to raise a family in comfort and to live your everyday without having to be constantly inconvenienced by having to walk 36 miles to work, build a knife to cut your food, build a fireplace to cook your food, build machines to do work for me whilst you're fitting in every other aspect of your life"
The class seems very optimistic about the lesson and all eagerly await the summary and conclusion. The teacher lifts up the glass beaker in triumph.
"So here we have life, my pupils, built upon 3 basic structures that are all inter-connected in order to support each other and in essence support life, we have all we need right here to be happy and to live contently, do we not?"
A proud series of nods and smiles waves through the crowd of students.
"We couldn't possibly fit anything else into this beaker, our lives right?"
The students all nod and and say "Yes" quite cheerfully.
"Right" says the teacher.
He then puts the beaker back onto the table top, then he stand ontop on the table and drops to his knees, he unbuckles his belt, unzips the fly on his trousers. exposes his penis, and begins to masturbate. Much to the shock of his class the teacher continues to pleasure himself, getting faster and faster with each second until he grabs the beaker, positions it in front of his erect penis and then proceeds to ejaculate powerfully into the full beaker. The semen however does not splash, or drip, or even spill over the sides. The semen sinks into the beaker being absorbed by the flour and the sand and fills in the small spaces between the pebbles.
"So" the teacher says as he re-adjusts his trousers
"In summary... No matter what we decided to dedicate our lives to, there is always room for sex. Good day to you all"