"Do you know what size dresses your mother in law wears?", asked my Pharmacist friend.
"Not sure, but I could find out. Why do you need to know?"
"Because I´m guessing you don´t know how much she weighs but we can get a fairly accurate idea of the dosage required from her size and that is indicated by her dress size. Of course, in hospital they´d weigh her and get the dose spot on but for your purposes her dress size will be near enough"
I´d mentioned my desire to drug my mother in law to John a week ago. Being almost as big a pervert as me, had come up with the answer. He handed me a box with the legend "Slumbadrops". "Does it work?" I asked.
"Well, there are several women locally who could testify to its efficacy - if they had any memory of it working!" He grinned . "Sneak the right number of drops into their drink and half an hour later you can do whatever you like."
"Will she notice?" I asked - already planning how I was going to get mother in law to take the drug.
"Tasteless, odourless and colourless. She won´t have a fucking clue. But you do have to give it time to work completely. After half an hour she´s all yours. Here you go. Have fun and take some photos so I can see how you got on."
He handed me the box with an instruction card.