Let me introduce myself a little, I'm a man almost 30 years old and still a virgin. I'm feeling like an idiot when I writing this..but can't help myself. I have need to release my thoughts here, it helps me relieve my stress level a little. I think this will be boring for 99% of people who start to read this, it's okay, you can stop reading whenever you want. I just have need to tell it somewhere..

What I'm about to say here is that I have problem with sex and everything about it.It's because I had a very bad experience with it..only one girl was willing to sleep with me, but when we met to fuck she was drunk and I wasn't able to get hard because I really don't like drunk people. She was arrogant later and told me that I will never make woman happy if I'm not able to fuck one. From that time I'm having heavy depressions sometimes and it become more and more stressful plus my self-esteem is on zero point. Now it's six years since that happened and I'm not able to get over it. I erased her from my life hoping I never see her again, but shit happens. Phone was ringing, I answered the phone and she was on the other side. Fuck it. It was two weeks ago and I'm still thinking about how to tell her I don't want her in my life again.

You know what is the funny part? Lot of people are masturbating, although they not admit it. It's a fine method to release some steam out of your body, get rid of some stress wighing their soul. Ironicaly not for me, almost after every orgasm I got sad. There are thoughts in my head telling me that cum was supposed to end in or on some girl. It's supposed to end in pussy, mouth, ass or end on pretty face and every other part of body..Not in the towel, shower or some photo on paper. Yes, I know, I'm offering tributes for girls here, but it's for feeling being desired at least for a little time. It's a nice feeling to tell this way some of girls here that I want them so much and that cum is for them, wishing to end on their hot body. But it ends same everytime, excitement worn off and sadness return. I know I'm crying here like a little child, but I must get out of me somehow. I will try to write some erotic stories like before, it helping me a little, which is nice. I really like to write about my dream having romantic sex with older woman, because I'm a big romantic type.

Thank you if you read it here, I really apreciate it. Next blog will be some dream story, so I hope it will be more exciting.

Have a nice day you all.