Hi everyone!

Just wanted to tell how this started for me and why I`m here, before I`m going back to work next week and won`t be able to post as often anymore...

As some of you already know when I was younger I was a bit shy and spent a lot of time on this site, looking at, well I guess you can guess what 

In 2016 I went to Italy for Erasmus student exchange programme, which brings us to how I met my ex (my first black guy):

So in 2016 I was in Italy at the height of the refugee crisis and a lot of the cities (in north where I was) were full with the refugees, trying to get to safer places. My friend from my course, used to live on the other side of the city from me and whenever I went home from her place, I always had to cross this parking lot, which in evenings were FILLED with prostitutes, HUGE trannies (imagine a 2m tall black as hell bodybuilder in a dress), drug dealers and suuuuper shady looking people, but the "safer" way was way way too long, so as a stupid 24yo from a small country I just kept on walking through there almost every night. Most of the girls there were giving me the look that they might kill me :D Defending territory I guess :D After a couple of days I noticed, that one guy is constantly following me, so ofc I immediately bought pepper spray (not easy to find in Italy), but anyway continued going through there :D So after a couple of days I decided to be brave and confronted him by putting the pepper spray can in his face. Turned out he was "working" there as basically a security guy for the girls and he was just "walking" me home, so that i dont get mugged... After this he actually started walking home me everytime I went to my friends place and after a couple of days he asked me out and as, a stupid 24yo, I ofc said yes.

NOW idk if i would say yes, because even though he`s was very nice, he definately was a criminal :D 

For 4 and a half years we were happily together, but in october we broke up... 

 I usually don`t whine about my exes, because, I`ve never dated anyone, who can be counted as an asshole or something like that. 

Same goes for Bayana (not his real name), he was one of the most caring, loving, protective, family oriented man I have ever had the honour to be with... However the family loyalty also meant that he coulnt say no to his family ever... 

As I`m sure you know Somalia has a lot of islamic influence and in large parts, the old traditions are quite strong and most families are very traditional, especially the women... In our case it meant, that his family was agaisnt him dating a non-muslim non-black girl. Especially a white girl, who does not want to be a stay at home mom, who would cook, clean and take care of the 6 grandkids, his mom was always draming about... best (or worst) of all, whenever I went to see his family  I always had to wear either a Guntiino (traditional somali dress ) or at least a hald niqab... At one point his mother even told me, that I should take out my IUD, finally get pregnant and become a normal woman or just leave her son alone... 

At that point I did not tell her, but I was thinking to myself, that the only reason why I have the IUD is that her son is terrible with condoms, doesnt know how to pull out and I have already had to use plan B twice and he hasn`t even asked me to marry him.. 

So even though he was the best man I have ever dated and if his family wasnt as traditonal as it is, I would have loved to spend my life with him... In october we mutually broke up...

Sometimes I still dream about what would have happened if I had say OK to him and his family, when they asked me to basically become a stay at home mom with 6 cute black babies... 

 I dont know if this is interesting to any of you, but I just had to let it out, before I start dating anyone again... 

ALSO I AM NOT DISCOURAGING ANYONE FROM DATING MEN FROM OTHER CULTURES!!! I`m just saying that in my case it was hard....