Before I write about my wants, needs, and sexual experiences, I'd to explain how I got there from where I was.

I was born and raised in a provincial town in the north of England. I was one of four children, a brother, Paul, who was a year older than me, and two sisters, Mary and Ann, 19 months and four years younger respectively. My parents were very...how should we say... prudish, prim, stiff, uptight? All of us kids were always very polite and respectful, we were brought up that way.

My school days were very uninspiring. I never had a boyfriend, never knocked around with the cool gangs...in fact I never stood out at all other than I was very adept at swimming, but that's only because my dad was a swimming coach. There were a couple of minor incidences that could be construed as sexual. The first was when my brother, Paul, forced his hand inside of my knickers and had a feel around.

The second time involved my cousin, Neville (not his real name). He was the same age as me. I was about 14 and we found ourselves alone in the lean-to at my auntie's house. We were sat on the floor and basically just explored each other's genitals. This incident, however, seemed to ignite my libido. I spent a lot of nights thinking about Neville and how I wanted to do it again and take things further. It did happen a second time, a few month later when I was 15. We got to the fondling stage but I just wasn't brave enough to insist we go further. I suspect he had the same idea and same sense of fear.

So there you have it, the extent of my pre-coital sexual history. No in school pregnancy, no intimacy with the school football captain, no story of how I seduced a teacher.....just a hormonal adolescent brother and a couple times of fumbling with Neville.