Had an interesting conversation with a female friend of mine, slave and myself. My friend had made a comment, that she understood the notion of being submissive, and being turned on by being obedient, but could not understand how she could bring herself to strip for bouncers etc. She could not understand how she could overcome the embarrassment of actually taking her clothes off. Well, slave had no issue explaining this. She asked her about stripping for a medical appointment - and of course she had, slave asked "embarrassing" answer "of course it was but, well, you have to. Heck it would be Embarrassing not to." The assertion followed immediately, that this was different. Slave asked, if she had ever wondered about nude modeling, Well, "yes", but well, that would be "embarrassing as hell", the follow question was nearly immediate however, "what if you had already signed up, and were at the class where you were to model? Would it not be embarrassing not to? You have a class counting on you, and told them that you would. Besides, at that point, you are not really a woman, expected to act as a woman, but a nude model, who is not supposed to be uncomfortable with it? Would it not be easier to be seen as a nude model, then?:" Of course my friend had to acknowledge that was probably true, then you were just doing what was expected of you. It would not be hard to be known as a nude model, really, she acknowledges, just mean you were less uptight.

Slave at this point made the strong point, that much of the social pressure, and embarrassment around this was how you were seen by others, because sure being nude, is embarrassing, but not being ready to be can be as well. She mentioned that I had made her do some work as a nude model when she was at school, and had insisted that she take an assignment at a local high school that the University based modelling group had a hard time keeping filled. She had presented to the University that she promised she would be one of the more flexible models they would have, at my insistence. She discovered that part of this was because the teacher pushed to have spread leg positions early, and of course, the University was using student models, with little experience. She said "while I probably found it just as embarrassing, I also had an emotional desire to be obedient, and a strong social pressure of having agreed to be, and as such a sense of my own self definition being in play." She said "each week, I would be humiliated and stuck having committed, each week I would screw myself up to go again, and be proud of myself for doing so.

Each week, I knew I was there to be embarrassed, humiliated and to get over it, to be more obedient. I knew that I was supposed to just do, and not question, and not being able to do that would be humiliating, feeling I had to, a huge turn on later, which of course was part of what made me work myself up every week". It was also that as she said, she did not really know that this particular modelling assignment was a lot more embarrassing than most. She discovered this after she had already been at least 6 times or 7 times, and frankly expected to just stick to it. She got a couple of other assignments at that point as well, where she was modeling at an adult studio, and one at the University, and it was somehow, much less raunchy, closed legged, demure positions, instead of leaning back legs open, or on all four etc. She also ended up going to the placement office, where she was thanked for sticking with the high school job, where it became clear, that no other model had gone more than twice, in the last few years.

My friend was sitting there starting to understand the sort of logic in the nude model thing. She essentially acknowledged that she had backed herself into a corner. Where she felt not returning would be embarrassing, and going meant she would be embarrassed sitting there open legged, or being on all four, so that the students could clearly see her sex, it was as she said, so they could clearly draw her inner and outer lips. It was made the even deeper trap, as she said, because the person at the University was aware of the reason other models would not return, for any other troubled assignment, because they already knew that she had kept going back to "the hardest assignment to fill" week after week, was huge, and worse, because she actually understood what had been said "I swear to god, that teacher tries to humiliate the models for fun" and frankly they thought she "lacked any sense of shame". She was after that, the model they would send, where others were uncomfortable. So as she told my friend, she was getting every gig, that they thought would scare off another model, and accepting ones, the University would have previously turned down, she also discovered, that she was being sold as "a more flexible model" and one where "not uptight about open positions." This was something that she discovered they were telling teachers and the studios when they were discussing models, along with the reality that she kept going back to the high school art class, where it was understood that he asked models to pose in lewd positions. She said, she was at the point where she could not really say no, was already in everyone's minds perfectly comfortable - so along she went. She understood that the model group committed to these jobs, based on the fact that she had not objected to the other, and were scheduled to meet her availability, how do you say no.  Especially when you have already agreed to be punished if you do.

Same idea, she said, as a slave, once you say you are, then what. It is that you go along, and everybody expects you to go along. It is humiliating to be stripped and abused, but if they already know you are a slave, and have already been told that you will go along? Once they strip you once, what do you say? She said even worse when your first instinct is to obey, and your second thought is to being obedient, and third to the consequence if you do not.  Once you are more than 30 seconds in, how do you turn back?  Once you are known for doing it, how do you not?  It gets even easier when you they know you will be punished for not going along. Once you have done it a few times, it gets to the point where it would be really awkward to not go along, especially when you are standing there barely dressed, in a locked on leash and collar, in obvious breast bondage, she told her.  Impossible when they already know you are a slave and you are in a bar full of people who do.  These are people who do think that you saying no is socially nuts, they also think that slapping, pinchings, spaking etc, are perfectly acceptable ways to get you to comply, and of course when they see you as a slave, and you see yourself as a slave, you think they have the right as well.  You could see my friend thinking about this.   

"I mean it is not exactly like you expect to have people respect you once they know you are a slave".  She mentioned the reality of how her own friend had flipped from thinking what was done to her was abuse, to abuse being essentially impossible.  She recounted the entire night in the bar, starting with the tit slap and loud comment on the subway.    My friend commented, "so basically, because you were already dressed like that, already had your tits in bondage, you couldn't say no".  The answer was "well, yeah the fact that my top had slave in huge lettering covering my tits, my tits looked like they were about the explode, and everybody could already see the welts on them, and my ass, well, would have made reacting awkward anyway, but, she also knew I was a slave, that was actually on my way out to be stripped, humiliated and caused pain, and would say nothing with others because of it, what ran through my head was frankly she had every right, I am in a car full of people that have already decided I deserve whatever happens to me, so well.... "I have the great escape of having the excuse of being a slave, so unless my owner objects, I am going along.   I mean if she had asked my permission - I guess I could have maybe mustered a no, depending how she asked. "   

My friend was very much interested in this mental perspective.  We ended up by talking a few days later about it, just her and I.  She asked about what say in what we did slave had, I told her, I basically had stopped asking, and just told her what to wear, what to do, and what was done, including the use of breast bondage, crop, clamps, belt etc, were just my whim .