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The cuckold "reality"
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Since around May this year my "situation" has rappidly changed. I think all submissive people can relate to that feeling, when no-one is dominating you. That feeling of; "well... THIS is boring..." Cus you can´t well be your own master now, can you? But ever sinces Maria made her entrence into my life all that took an 180 turn for the better.
The concept of "sexual fantasys" is an interesting one, especaliy for submissive people I think. A lot of times, what you fantasise about may not be something you truly desire in reality. Thats why its called a Fantasy. It may be enough like it is, something that you tap into sometimes, but that could be too extreme in real life. But ofcorse, the only way of TRULY finding that out is to try it for yourself! And if you are like me, a cuckold, then the big danger of trying it out is that you can´t take it back once its done. And the paradox that lies in this is that, THAT may just be what you want. To regret it a little, or maybe alot...
Now, I am not the most experinced Cuckold there is, nor the least. But for me, this has never been a problem. A REAL problem that is. Usally referred to as "cuck-angst", it can hit the best, but it has never creeped up on me so far. But never the less, we can all feel a bit "strange" in adjustment-periods, like the one I´am currently in.
Imagine not having ANY of your sexual fantasys or needs being fulfilled or met for almost your entire life, and then having like 70% of it happeing over the corse of 5 months. It can be a little bit overwhelming. ;)
My girl is involed with one woman whom we refer to as her "girlfriend". She also has a male lover at her school who in the last few weeks have become an increasingly larger part of every day life. He is the only one (that I know of!) that has had sex with her in the last 3 weeks. At the moment of writing I think she has told him about me, and maybe even about me being her bitch. She has also previously stated that she´s gonna fuck my roomie and keeps me in chastity from time to time. The key haning from a chain round her neck, showing it to people and openly talking about what it is to friends. Not to metion our mutual friend "Sofie", who on ocation showes up to dominate Maria through me.
Now, consider all this, and try imagening adjusting to having all this to adept to at once! :D The way things are looking I might be going for a REAL cuckold lifestyle-situation. This new man in her life probably won´t be leaving anytime soon, and maybe he will eventually become a part of my everyday life aswell. It´s an transision period, between this being my one true fantasy, and become reality insteed.
Sure, it might sound sexy to imagine you layin in the room next door, listening to your girl cumming over and over on another mans cock. But then comes the moring after, when she´s in the shower, and the two of you have to find things to talk about besides sex. And this, this is the Cuckold Reality. This is the part for me that is new, that feels weird but also totaly amazing. This is what its accualy about, for me at least. The akwardness of having to met the other guys eyes after me cumming like mad, while he was pounding my girlfriends pussy. That small, unfulfilled feeling when she tells me that "No, I can´t see you tonight, Iam meeting my Girlfriend for a concert." All those little things that aren´t sexy, just humilating for real. The dangerous stuff, that pushes the limits and makes you realise that "I am accualy a cuckold now. I can´t control this." Now I know that this may sound like the begining torwards it becoming more selfdetructive then nice. But, it is also here that communication is the key. Without that working so amazingly good with Maria, I would never take this path with her.
And ofcorse. The risk is what makes it exciting. If I feelt that it was only right, then it wouldn´t be domination, would it?
(In the future I will write less about the exploits of Maria, and more about my role in them. Otherwise it would be her blog insteed, and she is just a part of my sexlife, though currently beeing the focus of it. I will explore my bisexual side more, and even the dominat side. Directed at both other women and men!)
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Posted on : Sep 17, 2014
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